


Winter Hearts

by persephone325



Series: Winter Lovers [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Love, Self-Harm, Sequel, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-23
Updated: 2017-03-07
Packaged: 2018-03-25 09:30:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 13
Words: 28,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3805405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/persephone325/pseuds/persephone325
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The events of Winter Hearts take place after the events of Winter Savior and before Winter Sister. It fills in the gap between the two stories.</p><p>After being thrust into the role of super-heroine, Alexandra copes with the drastic change. But when she starts displaying uncontrollable powers, the rest of the team have to figure out how to help her control them as well as try and put an end to Hydra's plans to create clones of them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

_"I...love you." Alexandra whispered with a smile on her lips. Bucky sobbed loudly and tears fell down his cheeks as he held her tightly in his arms. Alex could feel his grip; a mix of cold metal and warm flesh. Everything faded away into black nothingness as she stared up at Bucky._

"No! Bucky!" The brunette screamed as she bolted upright in bed. She was drenched in sweat and her hair clung to her face. Her chest heaved up and down, her eyes quickly adjusting to the darkness around her like a nocturnal animal.

"Alexandra?" Bucky's voice drifted through the air.

"I'm here! Bucky...? I'm still here!" Her voice was panicked as she felt the bedsheet being pulled away from her sweaty body.

"Baby! Baby, it's OK." He wrapped his arms around her and held her against his chest, pressing her ear close so she could hear his steady heartbeat. "Shh... Shh..." Bucky stroked Alex's head and pushed her damp locks out of her face.

"Bucky..." She whimpered as she trembled against him. He rocked her gently and made quiet shushing noises.

"Another nightmare?" Bucky whispered before he placed a kiss on the top of her head. Alex stayed quiet, but he felt her nod against him. He moved his metal hand down her bare side and rested it on her hip. Alex felt comforted by his embrace and the coolness of his metal arm helped calm her breathing. "Are you OK? Do you want some water?" He asked.

"Please." Alex replied as she sighed loudly. Bucky turned and grabbed a glass of water off the bedside table. The brunette's eyes locked onto the glass and she went to take it from him with shaking hands.

"Ah, ah. I've got it." He smiled. Alex didn't put up a fight as he pressed the glass to her lips and tilted it towards her. She parted her lips and let the cold liquid flood her mouth and run down her throat. She swallowed eagerly, feeling much cooler already. "Better?" Bucky asked after he pulled the nearly empty glass away.

"Thank you, hon." Alex leaned against his chest again. Bucky wrapped her up in his arms once more and gently rested his chin on her head.

"Wanna talk about it?" He asked softly. Alex idly traced her fingers over the scar on her outer thigh and shook her head. "You sure, doll?"

"Do they ever stop?" She asked. Her voice was soft and meek sounding. As if she was a frightened child. Bucky squeezed his eyes shut and grimaced. It took everything in him not to lie to her. To tell her they did stop. Tell her she would be able to get a good night's sleep someday. Though he couldn't bring himself to lie to the woman he loved so much.

"Let's just take it one day at a time." Bucky danced around the question and laid back down, pulling Alex down next to him.

"OK, baby." She snuggled up close to him. "I love you."

"I love you too, sweetheart." Bucky stroked her hair and stared up at the ceiling as Alex drifted back to sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angst and panic, a heart to heart with Steve and Thor, and then fluff with Bucky. Just a typical day for Alexandra.

Alexandra woke up the next morning, her pillow stained with sweat from her forehead and hair. She stretched, sat up, and rubbed her eyes. The clock on the wall read 11:52 am.

_Shit!_ She cursed herself for having slept so late. With a sense of urgency, Alex hopped out of bed and jumped in the shower. She didn't even wait for the water to warm up though she immediately regretted that decision when she couldn't contain the startled yelp that left her lips.

After washing the important parts, Alex stepped out of the shower and towel dried her hair before getting dressed. She was never one for blowing her hair dry unless she was getting dressed up for a special occasion. Her hair hung down to her lower back; damp and smelling like, well what the bottle claimed to be, passion fruit.

She stepped out of her bedroom and wandered into the kitchen. Nobody was around and a frown spread across her lips. Since the time Ethan abducted her, she didn't like being left alone in the tower. Granted, she knew that security had been improved since then and Alex knew she could take out any intruder now if she needed to... It just still put her on edge when she didn't know where anyone was. Especially Bucky.

"Jarvis? Where is everyone?" Alex called out as she put a bagel in the toaster.

"Mr. Stark and Dr. Banner are in the lab together. Agents Romanoff and Barton are in the training facility. Thor and Captain Rogers are in the lounge." He replied matter-of-factly. Alex waited for Jarvis to inform her of Bucky's location, but the automated man remained quiet.

"And Bucky?" She inquired softly, prodding the disembodied voice for an answer. Jarvis remained quiet for a few seconds before replying.

"Sergeant Barnes is not currently in the tower." Alex couldn't calm the anxiety that welled up in the pit of her stomach. The rational part of her brain told her that he was OK. Bucky was a trained assassin and could fend off Godzilla single-handedly. However, the emotional part of her brain raced and was filled with all kinds of terrible thoughts.

_Hydra is still out there..._ The thought echoed in her brain like a shout vibrating back off the walls of a huge chasm. The toaster popped up, her bagel done. Alex couldn't even think of eating now. She left the kitchen and headed towards the lounge. When she entered, she saw Steve and Thor. Just like Jarvis had said.

"Hey, Alexa." Steve looked up from the thick book he was reading with a smile on his lips. Thor turned his attention from the massive bookshelf in front of him and smiled at her as well.

"Miss Alexandra." He greeted her in his polite way, with the distinct Asgardian accent in his voice. Alex had only met Thor a handful of times since she...became what she had. Each time, she felt nervous in his presence. Mainly because she didn't know how to act around someone who she associated with some kind of royalty.

"Hey, guys." She replied, trying to hide the nervousness in her voice. Steve cocked his head to the side, sensing something was wrong. Alex bit her lip as she gazed into his eyes. One thing was for sure. She was pretty much the opposite of Natasha; an open book.

"Is something the matter?" Thor spoke up after letting the silence linger for a few moments too long. Alex looked between the two blond men and sighed heavily.

"Just...a rough night." The brunette admitted as she sat down on the couch next to Steve. He gently took her hand in his and patted it reassuringly.

"Nightmares again?" He asked. Alex looked down and nodded silently. "Alexa, you have to talk to Bucky about them. He's really worried about you." Steve said. She looked up at him with a torn expression.

"I know... I know. It's just that..." Alex ran her hand through her damp hair. "He worries so much about me already. I don't want to add to his worry." She explained with a frown. "I know he still has them, too. I ask him if they ever go away, but he never gives me a straight answer." Deep down, she knew why. A small part of her knew they wouldn't go away. But she didn't want to believe that. She wanted to be a little optimistic about it.

"Asgard mead might be able to help you not have nightmares." Thor piped up from behind Steve. "Though you will probably have quite the headache in the morning." A slight smirk tugged at the corners of his lips. Alex couldn't help but laugh softly and Steve shook his head with a smile.

"Thank you for that tempting offer, Thor," Alex smiled. "But I don't like to drink." Thor nodded, still smiling slightly as he turned back to browse the bookshelf.

"Asgard mead aside," Steve began, the smile fading from his lips as he turned serious again, "I think you should talk to him. Keeping it bottled up inside isn't going to help anything." Alex sighed heavily again, knowing Steve was right.

"OK. I'll...have to figure out how to bring it up." She said as she stood up.

"Good." Steve smiled.

"So, where is Bucky?" Alex asked him. Steve blinked a few times, avoiding eye contact, and then shrugged.

"He said he was going out for a little bit." He replied. Alex smiled at him knowingly.

"Natasha's right. You're a terrible liar." She laughed. "As long as he's OK, that's all I care about." Steve nodded with a smile.

"He's fine." He reassured her. Alex felt like a weight was lifted from her shoulders. She excused herself and went back to the kitchen. Her stomach growled loudly as she fixed her bagel and sat down at the counter to eat.

About ten minutes later, Alex had finished her food and laid down on the couch. Her mind wandered and she thought about all she had been through the past two months. Ethan, Rumlow, Hydra, becoming a super soldier... The group also told her that she couldn't go back to her old life.

She was essentially dead. Her former life was gone. Her family was gone from her life. Her friends... Everything. She felt like a nobody. It made her reminisce about 'better' times when she was younger. She had a good friend, Amy, but they had fallen out of contact when Alex got together with David. Or Ethan, rather. He had forced her to cut ties with everyone in her life, pretty much.

_Amy would never understand..._ She thought sadly. _She's probably forgotten all about me. I'd forget about me, too. If I could._ Tears slowly crept out of the corners of her eyes and slid down her skin. She closed her eyes and draped her arm across her face.

"Alexandra?" A familiar voice called out after some time had passed. Alex made no attempt to move or make any sound of acknowledgement. Her body felt heavy with worry and guilt. "There you are. Are you alright?" Bucky asked. Alex felt him lift up her head. He sat down and gently rested her head on his lap. "Talk to me, please. What's wrong?" His pleading tone and obvious concern made Alex want to burst into tears.

"...'m fine." She mumbled. Her voice cracked with the threat of a sob escaping, but she plastered a fake smile on her lips. She kept her arm over her closed eyes. She didn't want Bucky to see her cry again. God knows he had seen her cry enough throughout the time he knew her. She was sick of being so weak. For once, just _once_ , she wanted to be the one to be strong for Bucky.

"You're not fine. I can tell." He replied, gently lifting her arm off her face. Alex kept her eyes closed, but it was clear from the slightly puffy red ring around the lower lid that she was crying. "Alexandra... What's the matter?" Alex slowly opened her eyes, blinking several times before she became accustomed to the light.

"I just...miss my life." She replied between sniffling. "Not all of it, of course." She locked eyes with Bucky. "I miss my family. They probably think I'm dead. Or that I hate them." She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.

"I...understand how you feel, doll." Bucky gently stroked her hair. "Well, a little bit. All my family _is_ dead... Except for Steve." He explained. "But I have you now, too." She watched him bring her hand up to his lips and he placed a gentle kiss on the back of it. A faint blush tinted her cheeks and a sheepish smile spread across her lips.

"You always know how to make me blush." She whispered.

"Oh?" He raised an eyebrow and smirked.

"I hate it." Alex joked, trying to keep her smile from getting any wider.

"Is that so, now?" Bucky asked, his expression remaining the same. Alex nodded. She didn't open her mouth because she knew she would start laughing if she did. "Did you take lessons from Steve on how to lie badly?" He asked, causing her to burst into fits of laughter.

"Oh my god! Ahaha!!" Alex squeezed her eyes shut and held her arm over her abdomen as she laughed. Bucky pulled her onto his lap and wrapped his arms around her. Alex took a few breaths as she calmed down.

"So, are you alright now?" He asked her softly, nuzzling his face into her hair. She smiled and sighed happily.

"Yeah. I'm good." Alex nodded in confirmation. Bucky kissed her cheek and she turned to look at him. She locked eyes with him and felt that familiar flutter of butterflies in her stomach. Her smiled spread wider and her cheeks grew hotter the longer they looked at each other. "So, where did you go today?" She asked curiously.

"Personal mission." He replied with a coy smile. Alex pursed her lips and stared at him.

"So it's a secret." She replied with an amused smirk. Bucky gently tapped her nose with his index finger.

"You're so smart, doll." He teased her, making Alex laugh again. "I see you've already taken a shower." He said after a moment.

"Yeah. Why?" She asked. Bucky shrugged.

"No particular reason..." He replied slowly, hinting at something. Alex bit her lip to hide her smirk as she casually reached out towards a mug someone left on the end table. No doubt it was Tony's. It still held a little bit of, now cold, coffee.

"Oh yeah?" She asked in a tone mocking innocence. Before Bucky could respond, Alex jerked her hand holding the cup and spilled the last of the coffee over the two of them. She gasped loudly with exaggeration.

"Oh no, Alexandra!" Bucky played along in a sarcastic voice.

"Looks like we need to get cleaned up..." She said, unable to keep from smiling.

"Certainly looks that way, doll." Bucky picked her up and carried her towards their room.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alexandra and Bucky are called to diffuse a robbery at a nearby bank. But all doesn't go as planned...

About twenty minutes later, Alex stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around her body. She flashed Bucky a playful smile over her shoulder as she left the bathroom. He laughed softly.

In the bedroom, Alex dried off and got dressed. She heard Bucky turn off the shower and step out. A smile spread across her lips as she slipped his dog tags around her neck. Bucky came up behind her and kissed her neck.

"Hey doll." He wrapped his arms around her from behind. Alex leaned into him and sighed happily.

"Hey babe." She replied, her fingers idly tracing over the engraving of the tags. "You should get dressed. Maybe we could do something today?" Alex suggested as she turned to face him. She placed her hands on his wet shoulders, feeling the cold metal under one hand and warm flesh under the other.

"Alright. Sounds fun." Bucky smiled and placed a gentle kiss on her lips.

"Sergeant Barnes? Miss Alexandra?" Jarvis' voice suddenly filled the room. Alex jumped slightly and Bucky chuckled.

"What's up, Jarvis?" Bucky asked as he dropped his towel on the floor and headed to the closet. Alex blushed and turned away, sitting on the bed with her back to Bucky's naked form.

"There's a situation at the bank that the police are having trouble containing. All the other team members are currently otherwise occupied." He replied simply. Alex couldn't help but get a little excited. She hadn't been on many missions since she became a superhero. In fact, she had been on two. Both times, she was only support for the others.

"I'll handle it." Bucky said. Alex furrowed her brows and looked over her shoulder at him. He was half dressed in his combat gear already.

 _Don't you mean 'we'?_ Alex thought as she stood up and headed over to the closet. She reached out to grab her combat gear, but Bucky quickly grabbed her wrist.

"Bucky?" She looked at him with a puzzled expression.

"What are you doing?" He asked her. His blue eyes locked on her, a deadly serious expression on his face.

"Getting dressed. What do you think?" She pulled her wrist free from his grasp with very little effort.

"You're not going, Alexandra." He insisted. Alex felt her jaw drop as she stared at him in disbelief.

"Excuse me?" She asked, feeling like he had just insulted her. Bucky stepped in front of her, blocking her from grabbing her gear. "Bucky, move." Alex glared at him.

"You're not going." He repeated, his hands closed into fists at his sides.

"The hell I'm not!" She protested as she threw her hands up in frustration. "Get out of the way! I need to get my gear." Alex tried to manuver around him, but he mirrored her movement to keep her away from what she needed.

"I can handle this myself. Stay here." Bucky ordered her. Alex felt her blood boil as anger welled up inside her.

"Stop treating me like glass, Bucky. I'm not going to break." She replied. Bucky opened his mouth to respond, but she cut him off. "I've been on two missions since I've joined the team. Both times I was just background support for you guys. I can hold my own now. You have to trust me." Bucky frowned as he stared deeply into her eyes. "Please..." Alex whispered after the silence lingered too long. Bucky sighed loudly and hung his head.

"Stay close to me. Please?" He asked as he stepped to the side, letting Alex grab her gear. She sighed and nodded before reaching out to grab her things. Bucky grabbed her wrist again and stopped her. "Please." He insisted.

"I will." Alex replied softly. "I promise." She added. After a moment, Bucky let go of her wrist and turned back to finish putting on his familiar combat vest. Alex grabbed her things and set them on the bed. Her tactical gear was similar to Bucky's, except that her vest had both sleeves still intact. She remembered asking him why his vest was like that.

Intimidation tactic, he said. When he was an assassin, it made people more afraid of him. Made them more compliant with his demands. There was no point in covering it; the plating needed no protection. Bucky also mentioned that whenever anything covered it, he felt restricted. Like he was tied down.

"Ready." Bucky's voice broke through Alex's reminisce and she turned to face him. They looked like a more deadly version of Bonnie and Clyde. Two black clad assassins; one more vicious than the other. One using deadly force and the other using charm and seduction. Alex made sure her weapons were secured and within easy reach before nodding at Bucky.

"All set." She replied, a smile tugged at the corners of her lips as a rush of excitement washed over her. It was so exciting to be able to actually fight alongside Bucky. The thought made her giddy and nervous. Like a young teenage girl about to go out on a first date.

"As much as I don't want to admit it, you do look good." Bucky smiled sheepishly and looked down at the floor. Alex laughed loudly and covered her mouth.

"Maybe I'll wear this getup more often, then." She teased him as they made their way out of the tower. "Just don't let my ass distract you from the task at hand." Alex stuck her tongue out him playfully.

"I can't make any promises." Bucky replied with a wink.

Less than ten minutes later, the two of them were on the roof of the bank. The police had given them the cliffnotes version of what was going on. Four robbers, several hostages, one wounded. As of yet, there were no demands. Sounded like the work of some amatures; most likely teenagers looking for a thrill. Alex sighed and shook her head as she and Bucky quietly made their way into the ventilation system.

The situation reminded her of when she and Amy were younger. Growing up in such broken homes, surrounded by false promises of love and affection. They ran away every chance they would get. Usually they would end up in an abandoned warehouse together and 'squat'. They'd always get in trouble for it. The police would send them back home with a slap on the wrist. Eventually, they were on a first name basis with almost every officer in the county.

Alex still felt like she had abandoned Amy when she left with Ethan. He convinced her that Amy was better off without her. Had her believing that she'd never be good for her. Never be able to protect her. She was never able to protect her before, and that would never change. Amy was probably off being happy with someone much better. Alex knew she was no good for her, but she still deeply cared for Amy.

"Alex!" Bucky hissed, snapping her out of her trance. She locked eyes with him.

"What?" She whispered back.

"Go! The coast is clear! We have to hurry!" He motioned for her to slip down through the hole where the vent cover used to be. Alex nodded and lowered herself down, dropping silently onto the floor. She looked back up at Bucky and nodded, giving him the signal that they were in the clear. He joined her quickly and the two held a crouched position behind a closed door. They heard the robbers talking on the other side.

"...for demands." One of them said.

"We should...this. I...bad feeling." Another one spoke up. It sounded like he was having doubts.

"Oh, shut up! You...grow a pair...stop..." A third voice made itself known. Sounded like the 'leader' of the group.

"Should be easy to take them down. They sound scattered and nervous." Alex whispered. She reached up to grab the door handle but Bucky quickly grabbed her wrist to stop her.

"Don't underestimate them." He warned. "We may have the element of surprise, but they're scared and unpredictable." Alex looked at him and nodded silently. "Take them out quietly. They'll no doubt end up covering different entrances. Think you can take out the one who comes in here?" He asked her.

"Yes. I can do it." She whispered confidently. Bucky nodded at her.

"Good. Stay here and take him out. Come meet me when you're done. We'll deal with the other three." He instructed.

"Yes, sir." Alex teased, evoking a smile from Bucky before he disappeared from the room. Alex stood up and pressed herself against the wall behind the door. Her heart was thumping in her chest as she waited for one of the kids to come through the door.

 _Non-lethal, non-lethal. Just kids. They're just kids._ She repeated over and over in her head. It was something she wasn't sure she would ever admit to Bucky. Each time she went on a mission, she had to fight the flashbacks to when she was kidnapped by Ethan and Rumlow. She wasn't sure why they would come to her during the missions and that frustrated her to no end. She didn't want Bucky to worry.

"Damn it! Why won't they listen to me?" The door burst open and one of the robbers came through. Alex recognized the voice. It was the one who had the bad feeling about the situation. Of course Alex would have to deal with the one with the conscious. The boy kept his back to Alex as he walked over towards the opposite side of the room, kicking a trashcan as he went. The door shut behind him and Alex wasted no time closing the gap between them and holding him in a chokehold from behind.

The young boy didn't stand a chance. He flailed wildly in Alex's grip, digging his nails into the fabric of her sleeve. She made sure to keep a tight grip around his neck so that he lost consciouness within seconds. He became a limp doll in her arms. Alex checked for his pulse before putting his unconscious body in a nearby closet. She took a breath and crouched down in front of the door.

Slowly, she opened the door a crack and spotted Bucky. One of the other boys was on the ground and Bucky was pulling him out of sight behind the teller windows. She saw him poke his head around the corner and wave her over to him. Alex carefully crept out of the doorway and darted from cover to cover until she was by Bucky again.

"Any problems?" He asked, checking her over for injuries.

"No." Alex shook her head. "He's taking a nap in the closet." Bucky smiled. "What's the situation out here?"

"It's strange. Only one of them is armed. He must be the leader, or something." Bucky whispered as he peeked over the edge of the teller booth. Alex took a cautious look as well. One robber was keeping watch over the hostages and the other was at the from door. He had an AK-47, but it was obvious he didn't know how to use it.

"We should disarm him." Alex said, already set on her plan. "I'll take him out. You get the other one. We need to make sure the hostages remain unharmed."

"Alex, let me - "

"Bucky, stop! We can't waste anymore time!" Alex glared at him. "Stop treating me like glass. I love you, Bucky. But let me do this!" Bucky looked down feeling defeated.

"Alright." He said after a moment. He brought his gaze up to her. "I love you too. You can do this." Bucky gave her a quick kiss and nodded at her. Alex turned and silently moved towards the opposite end of the teller booths. She glanced behind her and saw that Bucky was already gone.

"I can do this. I'm going to make Bucky proud." She told herself as she ducked behind a large column for cover. A sudden grunt caught her attention and she saw Bucky struggling with the robber and...a hostage? Confusion swept over her. "Shit!" She swore under her breath as the realization hit her like a ton of bricks.

The hostage wasn't a hostage...

The fake hostage pulled out a knife as the robber tried to overpower Bucky by himself. That proved useless as Bucky sent him flying clear across the lobby with a single kick. He crashed through the glass doors and Alex saw the police swarm around him within seconds. When Alex turned her attention back to Bucky, he had the fake hostage in a chokehold. The armed robber trained his gun on Bucky.

"Shoot...him...Ethan!" The boy choked out. Alex felt herself tense up.

 _No... No, it's not him. He's dead. Bucky killed him._ Alex squeezed her eyes shut and took a breath. When she opened them again, Ethan was there. His gun was still trained on Bucky.

"Still trying to save your girlfriend, I see?" He said smugly. Alex opened her mouth to speak but no words came out. She rubbed her eyes and tried to focus. It was still Ethan. He was _still_ there. Alex felt her hands shake as she reached for her gun and stepped out from behind the column.

"Alexandra!" Bucky's voice sounded far away; almost non-existent. Ethan turned to face her. That's when she saw his face; bloodied and bruised. One of his eyes was swollen and black, his lip was busted and blood ran down his chin.

"Well, if it isn't the little bitch herself." Ethan chastised her, pointing the gun at her chest.

"S-stop it." Alex protested. Her right hand gripped the holster of her gun, shaking the whole time.

"What are you doing, Alex? What are you doing with these guys?" Ethan asked, taking a step closer to her. "You know you belong with me. You'll only ever be good enough for me. Nobody else would want you." His words cut her deeply and tears stung at her eyes. She pulled the gun out of the holster and aimed it at Ethan's head.

"Shut up! You... You're wrong!" Alex cried out. Her hands were shaking as she held the gun, making her aim dangerous and off target. "They...care about me. You never did!"

"Do they really? Or do they just want you because of what you are now?" Ethan took another step closer to her. Alex took a shaky step back, still holding the gun at him. "You should come with me." His voice lowered and a smile spread across his lips. "I can take much better care of you than him." He jerked his head towards Bucky. "I know you know what I'm talking about..." Alex widened her eyes in horror.

"No!" She whispered in panic, putting her finger on the trigger.

"Do it! Come on!" Ethan urged her. "Or I'll kill your soldier and make you watch him die. Slowly and painfully." His words made tears fall down Alex's cheeks.

A tortured scream escaped her lips as she pulled the trigger. The explosive bang echoed loudly throughout the bank and seemed to snap Alex out of her hallucination. Bucky was lowering the unconscious fake hostage to the ground. The group of actual hostages were staring at her with terrified expressions. A baby was crying and a mother was trying to soothe it. Alex stared at them with a blank expression. For a moment, she wasn't sure where she was.

"Alexandra..." Bucky's voice drifted through the air as she approached her. She just stared, unblinkingly, off into space. "Alexandra. Hey, look at me." He placed his hands on her cheeks. Alex blinked several times and finally focused on Bucky's face. His blue eyes were so pained and full of worry.

"...Bucky?" Alex asked, confusion clouding her voice. She felt him take the gun from her grasp as he nodded.

"Yeah. It's Bucky. I'm here." He reassured her and tucked her gun behind his back before wrapping his arms around her.

"Ethan..." She whispered, not returning the hug. "He...I don't understand." Her voice cracked as Bucky stroked her hair. She was oblivious to everything around her. She didn't hear the paramedics come in, nor the police.

"Let's just get you home, doll." Bucky whispered. Alex didn't move. She _couldn't_ move. She was frozen against Bucky. "Come on, Alexandra." Bucky urged her, trying to get her to walk. She took one step and collapsed. Bucky caught her before she hit the ground and cradled her in his arms. She just laid there, looking like she was in some sort of comatose state.

"Just rest, Alexandra." Bucky whispered in a soft, calming voice as he carried her back to the tower. "I've got you. You're OK."


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex wakes up to a surprise, then slowly starts her downward spiral.

Alex slept. She just...slept. Bucky tried periodically to wake her, but she never stirred.

"How long has it been?" Clint asked from the doorway. Bucky was laying next to her in the bed just watching her chest move up and down.

"Just over three days." He replied, not tearing his eyes away from her. Alex suddenly jerked in her sleep and cried out. Clint took a few steps into the room and looked at Bucky with concern. Just as soon as it happened, Alex was still again.

"Does...that happen often?" Clint asked. Bucky sighed as he readjusted the covers and stroked Alex's hair.

"Every couple hours." He pursed his lips and gently ran his fingers over the lump in her arm where the IV was.

"You look exhausted." Clint licked his lips. Everyone in the tower was nervous and tense. One thing was agreed upon though. Alex wouldn't be going on anymore missions for a while.

"I'm fine." He waved his hand dismissively at Clint and held Alex's hand in his.

"When was the last time you - "

"I'm fine!" Bucky snapped as he turned to glare at the archer. Clint backed up a few paces.

"Alright. Sorry." He leaned against the door frame. "I'll just...leave you alone then." He waited a moment and then disappeared from view.

"I love you, Alexandra." Bucky whispered into her ear. He draped his arm across her protectively as she slept. Within a few minutes, Bucky had drifted off to sleep as well.

* * *

Alex's eyes fluttered open and she reflexively covered them with her arm. The light was bright. Blinding, even. She groaned softly and slowly opened her eyes, letting them get used to the light. A steady, rhythmic beeping caught her attention. When her eyes finally adjusted, she saw a heart monitor beside her bed. She traced the cord from the machine to her chest.

_What the hell?_ Alex rubbed her temples. Something brushed across her cheek. That's when she noticed the IV in her arm. _What's going on?_ She scanned the room, feeling relief wash over her as she realized she was safe in the tower. Another sound caught her attention. The shower in the bathroom was on. No doubt it was Bucky.

Alex sat up in bed with a gnawing feeling of deja-vu. It reminded her of when she woke up after Bucky carried her out of the hospital. Only now she knew where she was. She whimpered and rubbed her temples. She wondered why she was hooked up to to an IV again. _And_ a heart monitor.

_What the hell happened?_ She wondered how long she had been out. It certainly didn't seem like long. It was still light outside. What were they so worried for? Jeez, Bucky sure overreacted sometimes... She pulled the sticky tab off her chest and the heart monitor flat lined. Instantly, an alarm sounded. It was a shrill piercing sound that made Alex cry out in pain and cover her ears.

Steve, Dr. Banner, and Thor burst through the door, but stopped short when they saw her sitting up in bed. Alex screamed loudly in fright and Bucky came barreling through the bathroom door, wrapped in a towel.

"What the hell is going on?!" She screamed, her eyes wide and her expression confused. The four men looked at her and seemed to collectively breathe sighs of relief.

"Alexandra. How are you feeling?" Bucky came over and gently placed his hand on her cheek. It was warm and wet and she couldn't help but lean into it. She smiled slightly as she gazed up at him.

"I...I'm fine, baby." She replied. Bucky let his hand fall from her skin and he sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Are you sure?" Steve asked. The three men stood at the foot of the bed. Even though they seemed relieved, they held serious expressions on their faces. Alex furrowed her brows as she looked at them.

"Yeah. Why?" She asked. "Why am I hooked up to this stuff?" She motioned to the heart monitor and the IV.

"You fainted. Do you remember?" Bucky asked softly. Alex nodded.

"Yeah. I remember." She replied. "Bucky, you have to stop overreacting when things like this happen." She shook her head and tried to pull the IV out. Bucky stopped her and looked at her with confusion in his blue eyes.

"Oh, could you leave that in Miss Chase?" Dr. Banner spoke up. Alex caught his gaze and sighed.

"Guys, I'm _fine_." She insisted with a huff. "Look! It's still light out. I obviously wasn't out for very long..." She shook her head and looked at Bucky. "You have to stop overreacting about me." Steve crossed his arms and looked down.

"Miss Alexandra..." Thor spoke up, his voice was heavy with seriousness. Bucky waved him into silence.

"What...?" She raised an eyebrow. The silence hung in the air until Alex felt herself starting to get irritated. "Would someone please tell me what the _hell_ is going on?!" She threw up her hands in frustration. Bucky grabbed her hands and looked her in the eyes.

"Doll, you've been asleep for..." He paused as if the words were physically painful for him to say. "You've been asleep for three days. We thought you were in a coma, or something." Alex felt her jaw drop.

"Wh-what?" She stammered. Her eyes darted around in her head. "Don't joke around with me like that." She refused to believe what he told her.

"Tis no jest. Something as serious as this, we thought you were - "

"We were worried." Steve cut Thor off before he could finish. Alex ran her fingers through her hair and felt how greasy it was. She was also in her pajamas, so she assumed Bucky had changed her out of her tactical gear before putting her in bed. They must have been telling the truth.

"How are you feeling?" Dr. Banner asked, bringing her attention back to the three men at the foot of her bed. She shrugged and looked down.

"Not tired..." She laughed softly at her own joke. When she looked up again, Dr. Banner had a faint smirk on his lips. No one else seemed to be in a joking mood.

"What do you remember?" Steve questioned, placing his hands on the bed frame. Alex looked down and took a breath as she recalled the last thing in her memory.

"I remember..." She paused and looked up at Bucky. "I remember going on that mission to the bank with you." He nodded silently and gently took her hand in his. "Everything was going according to plan until..." Alex stopped and her eyes grew wide with horror.

"Until what?" Steve asked. Bucky shot him a glare over his shoulder as if to tell him to be quiet.

"I shot someone..." Alex whispered. She focused her gaze on Bucky. "Is he...?" She couldn't bring herself to finish. Bucky shook his head.

"He's fine. You hit his leg." He reassured her and caressed her cheek. Alex let out a loud, and relieved, exhale. "What happened to you in there?" Bucky asked softly.

"I..." Alex caught his gaze and looked down. She could feel four sets of eyes on her and it made her shift uncomfortably. "I don't want to talk about it..." She whispered, drawing her knees up to her chest. "I want to take a shower." Alex brought her gaze up to the three men at the foot of her bed. She held her arm out for Dr. Banner, silently asking him to remove the IV.

"Let me know if you start feeling less than stellar at any point during the rest of the day." He told her as he moved behind Bucky and took the IV out of her arm. Alex winced at the twinge of pain. She watched as a single drop of blood formed and trailed down her arm. Strangely, Alex had the overwhelming urge to see more.

"Alexa?" Steve's voice drifted through the air, cutting into her thoughts. She snapped her attention up to him.

"Oh, um, yeah. Sure." She nodded absent-mindedly and slid out of the bed. The second she stood on her feet, her knees buckled and she fell into the wall. Bucky was on her in a flash. He wrapped one arm around her waist and pulled her against him.

"Easy now, doll." He cautioned her. Alex looked up at him with a half-hearted smile. "Maybe you should wait a little bit before you get that shower?" He suggested.

"No." Alex replied quickly. "I...feel really grimy." She added, hoping she hadn't sounded as snappish as she thought she did. "Thank you, Dr. Banner." She smiled at the three men. "All of you, thank you for taking care of me."

"No need to thank us." Thor nodded with a smile. "I speak for all of us when I say I am glad you are well now." Steve and Dr. Banner nodded. "We will leave you now." The men turned and left her with Bucky, closing the door as they went.

"Will you tell me what happened?" Bucky held her in his arms and stared down at her. It was as if he was trying to read her mind. He brushed some of her hair out of her eyes.

"After my shower. Is that alright?" She asked softly as she stared back at him. Bucky nodded and kissed her forehead before releasing her.

"Sure, doll." Alex ran her fingers down his bare chest before she headed into the bathroom and shut the door.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky finds out some startling information about Alexandra, as well as himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realize this is a rather long chapter. But it didn't make sense to cut it into smaller sections. I hope you guys can forgive the length!
> 
> *TRIGGER WARNING!*
> 
> This chapter contains descriptions of self-harm. If that kind of material is triggering for you, you might want to skip the end of this chapter. I apologize.

The second Alex shut and locked the door, she placed her hand over her mouth to try and keep herself from crying. Or screaming. Tears fell from her eyes and she hurried to turn on the shower to try and muffle her sobs.

As the shower ran, Alex stood in front of the mirror and stared at herself. She didn't see the strong superheroine that the media portrayed her as. She still saw herself as that weak little girl that had to rely on her superhero neighbors to protect her.

 _Ethan was right..._ The thought crept into her brain and settled there like a leech. She couldn't make it go away. The words her hallucination had spoken to her echoed in her mind. _They don't need you. They can't take care of you the way I can. What could you possibly give to them? You're not special._ Alex gritted her teeth in anger and clenched her fists.

_You should be with Ethan..._

Alex quickly turned away from the mirror and stripped off her clothes before stepping into the shower. She stood under the shower head and let the water drench her body. She didn't move for a good three minutes.

 _What is happening to me?_ She wondered. Her hands were shaking as she grabbed the razor from the shelf. It was easy to break apart now that she was much stronger than before. She used to struggle with the damn things when she lived with Ethan.

 _Do it! Come on!_ Ethan's voice hissed in her mind. Or maybe it was her own subconscious... She couldn't tell as she let all but one blade fall to the wet floor. They hit the tiles with quiet little 'tink' noises. She held the sharp blade against the wet skin of her wrist...  


* * *

Bucky heard Alex turn on the shower and he sighed softly. He really wanted to talk to her about the whole thing that went on at the bank. But he didn't want to push her if she wasn't ready to talk about it.

He let his towel fall onto the floor as he searched through the dresser for some clothes. He pulled out a pair of jeans and a plain white tee. After he slipped them on, he pushed the drawer shut. He heard something fall behind the drawer with a noticeable 'clunk'. It was keeping the drawer from shutting all the way.

"Huh." He pulled the drawer out of the dresser and set it on the bed. As he knelt down, he saw a blue book shoved way in the back of the dresser. He raised an eyebrow curiously as he reached back and pulled the book out.

It was a plain looking, rather worn, book. Actually, it was a journal. Bucky had never seen it before but figured it was Alexandra's. He sat down on the edge of the bed and stared at the journal in his lap. A part of him really wanted to read it, but another part of him didn't want to invade her privacy. He debated for a little bit before he decided that maybe Alex wrote something in it recently that might help him understand how she might be feeling.

With some hesitation, Bucky opened the journal and skimmed through it. Pages and pages were filled with Alexandra's handwriting. Some entries were scribbled in as if done quickly and in a panic. Other entries were much calmer and eloquent. There were little notes in the margins and numerous mentions of someone named 'Amy'. In the beginning, some entries looked like they were written by someone else. Bucky wondered if it started out as a shared journal for Alexandra and this 'Amy' person.

He flipped through more pages and stopped when he spotted a mention of Steve. A smile crept across his lips as he read through the entry. It was dated only a few days before they had dinner when he first met Alexandra.

_Steve is such a great neighbor. It seems like he's kind of stuck in the 40s sometimes. Though I can't blame him. It's what he remembers. Plus, it's nice to see that there are still chivalrous men out there. I wish David would take a few notes. But I don't deserve Steve's kindness. He's said as much._

_Oh god! If Amy knew I lived next door to Captain America, she'd have a fit! I can picture her now, reading me the riot act for not having told her sooner. Sometimes... I think about calling her and seeing how she's doing. But I know she probably wouldn't want to talk to me. David's told me that, too. Besides, it's been so long since we talked... She'd be mad at me. Though I can't say I don't deserve it..._

The entry made Bucky clench his fists in anger. Though he calmed down after a moment and turned the page. The next entry was the day before the dinner.

_I've been seeing a bit more of Steve's friend lately. He's so quiet. Always keeping to himself. I've found myself purposefully waiting by the door and glancing through the peephole to see him coming or going. I've spilled things on my clothes before to use doing laundry as an excuse to walk down the stairs with him._

_Jeez, that sounds so pathetic when I think about it. David gets mad and tells me I'm useless and clumsy. But...I really don't care. Seeing Steve's friend is worth the abuse I get from David. I can tell he has a lot on his mind. I can tell he's in pain. It sounds strange... But I can feel his pain when I'm around him. I just want to work up the courage to talk to him and tell him everything will be OK._

Bucky looked up from the journal and stared at the wall. His mind was reeling as he tried to make sense of what he just read. He always felt like Alexandra was a little different than other people. Did she mean she could literally feel his pain? That was before when she was just a regular person. What did that mean now that she had powers? Was everything amplified? That was the whole point of the serum. It takes what you have and just enhances it.

He looked back down at the journal and turned to the next entry.

_It's been about two weeks since...the incident. I don't know how to handle it. On the one hand, I'm happy because I have this sort of family around me. Bucky and I are (at the risk of sounding corny) going steady. Haha. I've always wanted to say that._

Bucky couldn't help but chuckle as he read it.

_I'm living in the Avengers Tower with everyone. Though they seem to be walking on eggshells around me. I don't blame them. But it sucks because I can feel how nervous they are. Especially Tony. He still has PTSD from the whole thing with taking the missile into the wormhole and dying. Hell, I don't blame him. That must have been terrifying._

_Dr. Banner... That poor man. Nobody else can see it, but he's always so scared about losing control and hurting someone._

_Clint and Nat are a little difficult to get a read on. Natasha is so secretive. But I guess that's the point in being a master assassin. Or spy. Or infiltrator. She's damn good at her job, that's for sure. Clint is just so...stoic. The only time I really felt any strong emotion from him was when he accused me of being a 'mole' for Hydra._

_Thor seems to be constantly worrying about what's happening back on Asgard while he's here. He's super protective of Jane. Everyone can see that. He's a good man. Though I do worry that Loki can easily manipulate him because he still sees him as family. I just hope the next time they have a sibling rivalry, it doesn't wipe out the East coast..._

_Steve... Oh, Steve. He's protective of me. In a different way than Bucky is. I can tell he sees me as a 'little sister' of sorts. He puts on a brave face, but I know he's worried about me. Bucky, too. God, is he worried about Bucky... Whenever I'm around him, I can feel it. Like a weight crushing down on me. Sometimes I just want to look him in the eye and say 'go talk to him! Get all this stuff off your chest before it kills you.'. Or something to that effect. But I don't want to meddle in other people's business. It's not my place to say._

_Finally, my sweet soldier. Bucky is a whirlwind of emotions on the inside, but he hardly ever shows them. I guess it's from all the 'training' (and by that, I mean the brainwashing...) that Hydra put him through. He's in so much pain and I can feel it. I want to help him. I want him to tell me everything on his mind. I can handle it. After all, that's what being in a relationship means. Well, part of it anyway. But I guess if I want him to talk to me, then I need to be more open about how I feel as well. I just don't want to burden him with all my problems, too. He's got enough on his plate. I just hope he knows how much I truly love him._

The entry made Bucky's eyes sting with tears. He had no idea that Alexandra was going through so much. He was angry with himself for not having asked her about anything like this. It was his job to make sure she was OK. It was his job to protect her! He was failing... Despite his anger, he kept reading. It was the last entry so far, and it was dated the day before the situation at the bank.

_I've tried to convince myself that they'll go away. But I've been having nightmares ever since the night Bucky, Steve, and Natasha rescued me. They just won't stop. I know they won't ever stop. I ask Bucky, but he never gives me an answer. I know he still has nightmares. He's had nightmares that he doesn't remember the next day._

_I was scared the first time it happened. I didn't know what to do. He wasn't Bucky... I could see it in his eyes. The way he looked at me like I was an enemy... I can still see that look. His eyes were devoid of all emotion and he looked like the assassin Hydra wanted him to be._

_I knew I could have overpowered him and calmed him down that way. But it didn't seem like the right thing to do at the time. If it was Bucky, then I would have done it without a second thought. But I was dealing with the Winter Soldier. The way he just threw me around like a ragdoll, spitting words at me in Russian, even punching me when I first tried to resist. That I could handle. But the fact that I didn't know what to do to help him out of it... That's what scared me the most._

_Luckily, the serum inside me helps the healing process. So by the time I woke up, I had no marks or anything. Bucky was none the wiser to what had happened. I hope it stays that way. I don't want him to feel like he's similar to Ethan in any way. Every relationship has its problems. If this is ours, then I'm completely fine with it._

_The serum... Because it speeds up my healing process, I've been able to hide my cuts from everyone. It's the only way I know how to cope with everything. I don't know why I feel the need to do it. It just...makes me feel good._

Bucky couldn't read anymore and he quickly shut the journal. At that moment, he heard a loud thud from the bathroom. His heart jumped as he bolted up from the bed and the journal fell onto the floor. He turned the knob, but it wouldn't budge.

"Oh god, no!" Bucky exclaimed. He could hear faint sobbing on the other side, but the sound of the water was muffling it. "Alexandra?! Are you OK, doll?" Panic set in as he tried twisting the doorknob again.

"...don't..." Alex's voice was quiet as it drifted through the door. He heard her sob loudly, followed by a cry of obvious pain.

"Open the door, doll!" Bucky begged. He slammed against it with his shoulder a few times, hearing the wood crack and splinter under the pressure. He looked down and swore to himself as he remembered he had a metal arm.

"Bucky...please..." Alex sobbed.

"I'm coming in!" Bucky yelled as he took a small step backward and clenched his metal hand into a fist. He punched through the door with extreme ease and was able to unlock it. He wasted no time opening the door and rushing into the bathroom.

"No... Don't look!" Alex cried out as she saw Bucky. She was down on her knees, hunched over with her wet hair hiding her face as she turned back to her bloody arms. The water underneath her was a pale shade of red as it swirled down the drain.

"Jesus, baby! What are you doing?!" Bucky rushed over to her and opened the glass door that separated them. He didn't even turn off the water as he sat down on the tile floor and pulled her onto his lap. He grabbed the small razor out of her hand and tossed it aside.

"I don't..." Alex sobbed. "Bucky...I don't want you to...see me like this..." She whimpered as her arms fell into her lap. "Just...go." Bucky shook his head.

"I'm not going anywhere, doll." He gently stroked her wet hair and wrapped his other arm around her naked body. He gently guided her head to rest on his shoulder as she cried softly. With some hesitation, Bucky brought his gaze down to assess the damage she had done to herself.

Both her forearms, from her wrist to the bend in her arm, were covered in blood from countless cuts. He continued to stroke her hair as he looked for any other cuts. There were a few on her neck and chest as well. Blood was mixing with the water and streaming down her body. She was shaking as he held her. He didn't even care that his clothes were soaked and Alexandra's blood was staining his shirt.

"Bucky..." Alex whispered as she brought her head off his shoulder to look him in the eye. He gently placed his hand on her cheek and stared back at her. "I don't want to die. I just don't know how to cope with the pain." Shaking, she brought her hand up and gently trailed her fingertips along his jawline. Bucky nodded seriously.

"I know, doll." He kissed her softly, letting his lips linger on hers for a moment. He wanted to make sure that she was feeling all his love for her. He wanted her to feel his love _only_ in that moment. That was what she needed the most. He pulled away and let her rest her head on his shoulder again. Bucky made quiet shushing noises as she cried.

"I love you." She said softly. Bucky smiled slightly and kissed her with the corner of his lips.

"I love you too, doll." He replied, thankful that the water beating down on them was able to wash away the tears that fell down his cheeks.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A small meeting gets cut short, and Steve and Bruce find out the burden that Alex has been carrying since she moved in with them.

Steve was the first to speak to the group as they had all gathered in the lounge.

"It hasn't been officially announced, but we've all been thinking it." His tone was stoic and serious. "Alexa shouldn't go on anymore missions. At least for a while." Natasha crossed one leg over the other and leaned back against the couch.

"Has she said anything about what happened?" Clint asked. Steve shook his head.

"I think we pushed her into this too soon. I don't think she was ready." Dr. Banner spoke up from his chair in the corner of the lounge.

"I agree." Steve nodded. "We didn't even ask her. We just kept her locked up in the tower like a prisoner."

"To be fair," Tony interjected, "she never complained about it. She never - "

"That's not the point, Stark." Steve interrupted him.

"That's exactly the point, though." Tony shot back as he looked at the rest of the group. "None of us ever asked to be superheroes. We just accepted it. We did it because we had to."

"No. You did it for the fame and publicity." Natasha replied with a mocking smirk on her face. Thor snickered softly.

"At first I did." Tony corrected as he pointed at her. "But, after a while, I put that aside. Because I needed to protect Pepper. There were bigger things at stake than me." He spoke quietly.

"Did you just admit that the world doesn't revolve around you?" Clint asked.

"Stop it!" Steve exclaimed, garnering the attention of everyone in the room. "This isn't the time for this petty nonsense."

"Captain Rogers is right. We have more pressing matters to attend to." Thor intervened. "We have to decide how to handle Miss Alexandra's condition, as well as figure out if Hydra is still trying to make replicas of you."

The room turned quiet and tense. Dr. Banner, Clint and Natasha looked down at the floor. The big elephant in the room that nobody wanted to talk about. The silence prevailed until Jarvis spoke up.

"Captain Rogers? Sergeant Barnes is requesting your presence." He stated. Steve looked at the group.

"We'll continue discussing this later." He said. "I'll tell Bucky what we decided about Alexa. At least for now." He turned and headed towards the door and made his way to Bucky's room.

* * *

"It's OK, baby. You'll be OK." Bucky whispered in Alexandra's ear. He wasn't sure how long he had sat there with her, cradling her in his arms as she shook and sobbed softly.

"I'm...so broken..." Alex whimpered. Bucky brushed some of her wet hair out of her face.

"Hey." He gently held his hand under her chin and looked at her. "Don't talk like that, doll." Her eyes were red-rimmed and slightly puffy. It hurt him to see her in so much pain.

"Buck?" Steve's voice drifted through the air as he entered the bedroom.

"Bathroom, Steve. Grab a towel, please." Bucky called back. "Er, a couple actually." He corrected himself. Steve sighed loudly.

"Bucky, I swear. If this is anything like the time you asked me to - " Steve stopped short when he appeared in the doorway and saw the scene before him. The half busted door, Bucky holding Alex in his arms and his shirt stained with blood. "Oh...my god..." He stared at them for a good few seconds before Bucky managed to snap him out of his trance.

"Steve! We need the towels." He insisted. Steve nodded, not exactly sure what was happening. He reached in and turned off the water before draping a towel over Alex to cover her. "Thanks." Bucky said softly. Alex turned her head and saw Steve. She squeezed her eyes shut and buried her face in Bucky's chest.

"No...Steve..." She choked out. "I don't want anyone to see me like this..." Steve saw her hand tightly grip the fabric of Bucky's shirt.

"It's OK to need help." Bucky replied. Steve seemed to be too shocked to say anything.

"I shouldn't _need_ any help. I'm supposed to be...this strong superhero. And I can't even cope with my stupid nightmares." Alex sobbed softly as a chill swept over her and made her shiver.

"Bucky?" Steve whispered, his eyes locked onto Alex's blood covered forearms. Bucky brought his gaze up and briefly made eye contact as if to say 'I'll tell you about it later'. He stood up without much effort and held Alex in his arms. Steve stepped out of the way and followed Bucky into the bedroom as he laid Alex down and covered her with a blanket.

"You're gonna be OK. I promise." Bucky said softly.

"After we left, did she say anything about what happened at the bank?" Steve whispered. Bucky opened his mouth to speak, but Alex interrupted him.

"It was him! He was there!" She shouted in a panic. Steve and Bucky jumped back, startled by her sudden outburst. "He's...He wants me back!" She looked around the room frantically, as if she was going to see him standing in the corner.

"Hey, hey! Alexandra!" Bucky sat on the edge of the bed and tried to calm her down. But it only seemed to make the situation worse. Alex squirmed and thrashed about in the bed, crying hysterically.

"I'll go get Dr. Banner. Maybe he has some sort of - " Steve began.

"Just go! Hurry!" Bucky cut him off. Alex seemed like she was trying to get away and Bucky was obviously having a hard time holding on to her. "Alexandra, please! It's Bucky!" He tried to break through her panic, but she seemed so far gone in that moment.

"What's going on?" Bruce came through the door, looking rather worried at the scene in front of him.

"Can you give her some kind of sedative?" Bucky asked, tightly holding onto her arms. So tight, that he was sure he would leave her with bruises. But he just didn't want her to hurt herself.

"Try and keep her arm still." Bruce instructed Bucky. He nodded and shifted his weight to straddle her hips and pin her arms at her sides.

"No! He'll come for me!" Alex screamed.

"No one is going to come for you, Alexandra! I won't let them!" Bucky exclaimed as Bruce was finally able pierce her blood stained arm with the needle. He pumped a syringe full of liquid into her arm and Alex immediately started to relax. Within about a minute, she was out. Bucky sighed loudly and got off the bed, covering her with the blanket again.

"So...What happened here?" Bruce asked, rubbing his jaw.

"It's a long story." Bucky replied, exhaustion prevalent in his voice.

"Did she do that to herself?" Bruce pointed to the blood that covered Bucky's shirt and the sheet on the bed. Bucky looked down at the floor and stayed quiet. "I'll take that as a yes..." Bruce said softly.

"She's been doing it for a while." Bucky sighed, unable to take his eyes off the floor.

"What?" Steve asked, the shock evident in his voice. Bucky just nodded. He knelt down and picked up Alex's journal that had fallen onto the floor. He held it in his hands and slowly brought his gaze up to see Bruce and Steve.

"She's been doing it for a long time, from what I gather." Bucky added, gripping the blue hardcovered journal a little tighter.

"Is that hers?" Steve asked.

"No. It's mine, Steve..." Bucky rolled his eyes. "Of course it's hers!" He snapped, throwing his hands up in the air in frustration.

"Calm down, Bucky! I - "

"Don't tell me what to do, Rogers!" Bucky interrupted. "You don't get to tell me how to feel when the woman I love is hurting herself to cope with _our_ problems, on top of dealing with hers!" He yelled at the top of his lungs. Steve and Bruce stared at Bucky in confusion.

"Our problems?" Steve asked. Bucky opened the journal and furiously flipped through the pages until he found the journal entry he was looking for.

"Listen!" Bucky exclaimed as he began to read. "I'm living in the Avengers Tower with everyone. But it sucks because I can feel how nervous they are. Especially Tony. He still has PTSD from the whole thing with taking the missile into the wormhole and dying. Hell, I don't blame him. That must have been terrifying." He took a breath before continuing.

"Dr. Banner... That poor man. Nobody else can see it, but he's always so scared about losing control and hurting someone. Clint and Nat are a little difficult to get a read on. Natasha is so secretive. But I guess that's the point in being a master assassin. Or spy. Or infiltrator. She's damn good at her job, that's for sure. Clint is just so...stoic. The only time I really felt any strong emotion from him was when he accused me of being a 'mole' for Hydra."

"Bucky - " Steve tried to stop him, but Bucky continued.

"Thor seems to be constantly worrying about what's happening back on Asgard while he's here. He's super protective of Jane. Everyone can see that. He's a good man. Though I do worry that Loki can easily manipulate him because he still sees him as family. I just hope the next time they have a sibling rivalry, it doesn't wipe out the East coast..." Bucky brought his gaze up and looked at Steve before he read the last passage.

"Steve... Oh, Steve. He's protective of me. In a different way than Bucky is. I can tell he sees me as a 'little sister' of sorts. He puts on a brave face, but I know he's worried about me. Bucky, too. God, is he worried about Bucky... Whenever I'm around him, I can feel it. Like a weight crushing down on me. Sometimes I just want to look him in the eye and say 'go talk to him! Get all this stuff off your chest before it kills you.'. Or something to that effect. But I don't want to meddle in other people's business. It's not my place to say."

Bucky looked up and stared at the two men. Bruce ran his hand down his face and covered his mouth. Steve gripped the foot of the bed and stared at the floor. The silence was so heavy, it seemed to crush the three of them. Nobody seemed to want to speak.

"This serum..." Bruce spoke up, cause Steve and Bucky to look at him. "This serum is similar to the ones they used on you two?" The two soldiers nodded silently. "What does it do?"

"I can't speak for Bucky," Steve started, "but the serum they used on me enhanced what was already inside me. Erskine said 'it makes good great and makes bad worse'. Anyone on the internet can find that out nowadays." Bruce nodded before he brought his attention to Bucky.

"I don't know." He admitted. "I didn't need to know, so I didn't ask. I was given orders, so I followed them." A frustrated sigh left his lips. "I did hear Zola say something about how he altered the formula he gave me. Something about needing it to be stronger for his...newest weapon." He gritted his teeth as if the words were painful for him to say.

"OK... Maybe the serum Miss Chase was injected with was some sort of combination of the most powerful parts of the serums you two were given?" Bruce suggested. "I'm going to go do some research. See what I can find out." He turned to leave, but Bucky stopped him.

"How long will she be out?" He asked. "There are...things I need to know from her. Things I need to ask her." He cast a worried glance over his shoulder at her as she laid unconscious in the blood stained bed.

"A few hours at most." Bruce replied. "She'll be groggy when she wakes, so take it slow." He added. Bucky nodded.

"Thank you." He said softly. Bruce nodded once in acknowledgement before leaving the two soldiers.

"Bucky, I'm sorry." Steve apologized. Bucky shook his head.

"Don't apologize. You were just trying to keep me calm." The brown haired soldier replied. "I just...can't imagine what I'd do without her. It sounds strange, I know." He sighed and sat next to Alex on the edge of the bed. "Being around her..." He seemed to struggle to find the right words to say. "I can't explain it, Steve." Both his hands enclosed one of Alex's hands and he sighed again.

"You don't have to explain, Buck." Steve assured him. "You love her. It's obvious she loves you, too." Bucky looked at Steve and smiled slightly. "Need help with anything?" He asked.

"No. I've got it." Bucky replied. "Thank you, though."

"No problem. Just know that I'm here for you, too." Steve smiled and headed out of the room, closing the door as he went. Bucky turned and faced Alex. Her cuts had already stopped bleeding and Bucky felt his shoulders relax. He stared at her for a few moments before standing to clean up the mess.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve and Bucky have a little talk and then Alex wakes up. She has a talk with Bucky and there's so much love, you won't be able to stand it.

_"How long until it's ready?" The man asked. His hair was slicked back and greasy looking, but he was obviously in charge. The room was small with a few desks that had computer monitors on them. In the center of the room, there was a large tube filled with some kind of liquid. Floating inside, hooked up to some kind of life support system, was a naked man._

_"A few hours at most." A young man in a lab coat replied. He was holding a clipboard and pen, standing in front of the tube. It looked like he was monitoring the man's vitals._

_"Good." The man with the slick backed hair smiled as he continued to stare at the man in the tube._

_"If we had access to - " The young man began, only to be abruptly cut off._

_"Hey!" The man in charge shouted suddenly. "Nobody asked you anything. Nobody told you to speak." His tone was condescending and mocking as he stepped a few feet towards the man in the lab coat. "I know you're new here. But you should know your place, Alfred. OK?"_

_"Albert." He replied. The man with the greasy hair took a few more steps closer to him._

_"What was that?" He asked._

_"My name. It's Albert, not Alfred." He clarified, not sensing the trouble he was getting himself into. The man in charge arched his eyebrows._

_"I...don't remember asking your name." He said, putting a hand on his shoulder. His grip was strong, bordering on painful. "You know what? I don't care what your name is." He added. Before he could speak again, the man grabbed his gun from his holster and fired one round off into Albert's skull. He fell limp onto the floor, blood pouring from his wound._

_The other workers in the room looked up from their monitors with startled expressions. Their eyes seemed to shift from Albert's dead body to the man who had just shot him, and then back to the body again._

_"Anyone else?" The man asked, holding his hands out as he stared at the terrified workers. Immediately, they scrambled to get back to work. "You!" He pointed to a woman with chestnut shoulder length hair. She jumped in fright. "You monitor the vitals now." He commanded. She nodded silently and rushed over to Albert's body and grabbed the clipboard and pen. Drops of blood stained the white papers, but she did her best to ignore them._

_"Someone get the cleaning crew so they can get Alfred out of here!"_  


* * *

Bucky busied himself by changing the blood stained sheets of the bed and putting on a different shirt. He was careful to move Alexandra gently as he stripped the bed. Her wet hair soaked the pillow case and pillow, so he stripped everything off to be washed.

After he put fresh sheets on the bed, he slipped a nightgown on Alexandra. He knew no one would come in without knocking, but it was still the right and decent thing to do. His gaze fell to the dried blood on her arms. It made him angry. Not with Alex, but with himself. She was in so much pain and he never bothered to ask her. He was just going around assuming everything was fine and dandy with her when that, very clearly, was _not_ the case.

Bucky headed into the bathroom and grabbed a washcloth from the counter. He wet it with warm water, then wrung out the excess so it was just damp. He came back into the bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed. Gently, he took Alexandra's arm and rested it on his lap. With careful delicacy, he wiped away the blood and finally saw the cuts she had inflicted on herself.

They weren't deep, thankfully. But there were just...so many of them. They were all so close together like she was trying to scar every inch of her forearms. Some of them seemed to intersect each other, and some intersected the same cut more than once. They all seemed so red and angry looking. It made Bucky feel terrible.

He wrapped his arms around Alexandra's torso and pulled her upper body off the bed. She was limp in his arms and that scared him for a moment. If not for how warm she was and the steady rhythm of her breathing... Bucky couldn't bear to think about that night. He draped her arms over his shoulders and rested her head on his shoulder. He just wanted to hold her. He wanted to be close to her and never let her go.

"I love you, Alexandra." Bucky whispered, holding her tightly against him. He found himself gently stroking her hair and rocking her in his arms. "I hope you know that, doll." He gently pulled her away from him and cradled her head in his metal hand. She looked so peaceful and calm, laying in his arms. After a few moments, Bucky laid her back on the bed.

"Knock knock." A voice drifted into the room from the other side of the door. Bucky didn't look away from Alexandra's sleeping form as he responded.

"Come in." His voice was devoid of any kind of emotion.

"Hey. How's she doing?" Steve spoke softly, the concern obvious in his voice.

"She's still out from whatever Banner gave her." Bucky replied. "I changed the sheets, put a nightgown on her and..." He sighed heavily. "Cleaned her wounds." He felt a hand gently clasp onto his shoulder.

"What happened?" Steve asked. Bucky turned to face him, still wearing his blood stained shirt. He sighed again and looked down.

"I should have known something was off. She wasn't acting like herself." He criticised himself and shook his head.

"You can't blame yourself for that, Buck." Steve placed his hand on Bucky's shoulder in an attempt to comfort him. Bucky just shook his head, still facing Alex.

"I care about her more than anything." He said. "She was the first person who didn't look at me like I was some kind of...monster. She knew who I was, what I had done... And none of that mattered to her." Bucky sighed heavily again. "I should have...talked to her more."

"Bucky, I need to talk to you about something." Steve said. Bucky stood up and turned to face him.

"Great. More serious news." He replied sarcastically. "What is it?" This time, it was Steve's turn to sigh.

"I had a talk with the others." He said slowly, wanting to phrase everything right. "We all think it's best that Alexa not go on any more missions until this gets sorted out." Steve's shoulders seemed to fall with relief as he spoke the words. "The rest of the team will handle the situation with Hydra and the replication plans they have." He paused to let Bucky process what he had told him. "Is that alright?"

"It's...actually the best news I've heard all day, to be honest." Bucky replied with a half smile. Steve smiled slightly as well.

"I just wonder how she'll take it." His smile faded to a half frown as he cast his gaze to Alex as she slept in the bed. Bucky turned to look at her as well.

"You let me worry about that." He replied, chewing on the inside of his lip. Steve nodded and turned to leave.

"Let me know if you need anything." He offered before leaving Bucky alone with Alex again. Bucky walked over to the side of the bed Alex was laying on and stared out the window. The sun was starting to set and he checked the time.

_5:49_

He rubbed his eyes. The day had certainly been a stressful one. It was a good thing there weren't any emergencies that needed the team's attention. His stomach growled but he didn't care. Food could wait for now. He wanted to be by Alexandra's side when she woke up.

"Mmm..." Alex made a soft groaning noise and Bucky was by her side in a flash. He enclosed her hand in his and looked at her eagerly. Her eyes opened slowly and she seemed so much calmer than she had earlier. He wondered if she would remember what happened.

"Hey, doll." Bucky smiled and leaned down to kiss her forehead. "How are you feeling?" He stared into her eyes. She blinked a few times and looked around the room. "What's wrong?" His smile faded to an expression of concern. Alex took a few more moments to survey her surroundings before she finally locked eyes with him.

"I just..." She paused, like she was still trying to get her bearings. "I had a really strange dream. Usually I don't remember my dreams. But this..." Alex forced herself to sit up. "This one felt real." She shook her head and looked down. Her expression flashed briefly to one of shock and horror and she jerked her hand away from Bucky and hid her arms under the sheets.

"Hey. It's alright, doll." Bucky reassured her, gently placing his hands on her shoulders. "I'm not mad or anything. Just concerned." He squeezed her shoulders slightly. When she didn't look up, he moved his hand to cup her chin and gently lifted her head up.

"No one was supposed to know." Alex whispered. Her hazel eyes seemed to be so full of sadness, pain, and fear. "Now three people know..." A heavy sigh left her lips and she cast her gaze downwards, as if she was ashamed.

"Don't worry about that right now, pretty girl." Bucky placed his hands on her cheeks and smiled. "You're alright and that's all that matters." He said and Alex looked up at him. "That's all that matters _to me_." Bucky added with emphasis.

"I love you, Bucky." Alex said with half a smile on her lips. "I'm sorry I put you through that." Bucky suddenly pulled her onto his lap and hugged her tightly.

"I love you too, doll." He breathed into her ear with a smile. Alex wrapped her arms around him and rested her head on his shoulder. "We'll get through this. I'm not going to lose you again."


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flashing between Tony and Bruce, Natasha and Clint, and Alex and Bucky, the pieces of the puzzle start to fall into place.

Bruce clenched his fists together and sighed in frustration. He hung his head, tearing his eyes away from the computer screen in front of him. He didn't want to see the red words flashing on the screen anymore.

_Analysis failed. Unknown genetic makeup detected._

He had taken some of Alexandra's blood while she was sedated to finally see about running some tests on it. He wasn't sure why he hadn't done it sooner, but it looks like that wouldn't have mattered.

"Jarvis, run it again." Bruce said, not knowing what else to do.

"If I run the test again, there will be no more of the blood sample left afterwards." Jarvis informed him.

"Well what the hell should I do, then?" Bruce exclaimed as he slammed his fists on the metal table, making slight dents in the surface. One of Tony's suits came to life and assumed a defensive stance, holding one hand outwards; ready to fire off a repulsor blast if needed.

"Please, calm yourself Dr. Banner." Jarvis requested politely.

"Oh, what are you gonna do about it?" Bruce sniped as he stared at the automated suit.

"Easy, buddy." Tony piped up as he entered the room. The automated suit seemed to go into standby mode and Bruce turned around to face him. "What's up, buttercup?" He smirked. Bruce shook his head.

"I don't know what else to do, Tony." He replied. "I've run Alexandra's blood more times than should have been necessary, but I just can't figure out what the serum did to her." Bruce shrugged. "Well, besides the obvious effects."

"Jarvis? Is my new toy ready?" Tony asked, causing Bruce to raise an eyebrow.

"It it ready and waiting in your lab, Sir." Jarvis replied. The billionaire smiled and motioned for Bruce to follow him.

"This should help us out." He said as he grabbed what was left of Alexandra's blood and headed out of the room.

* * *

Natasha dropped quietly onto the floor from the vent. She took a look around and saw nothing to indicate anyone was around. A quick hand motion on her part was all that was needed to make the archer follow her. They were both quiet for a few moments. The room was dark, save for a few dim lights that flickered on the verge of burning out.

"Grab anything that looks important." Natasha said as she began rummaging through desks.

"What if everything looks important? It's been a few months now. How can we be sure if anything will still be here?" Clint asked as he pushed around some papers on another desk. The red head looked up at him with a serious look on her face.

"Then we take everything, Clint." Her tone was deadpan and she sounded somewhat irritated. "I'm not giving up that easily." The blond archer held his hands up as if to surrender.

"Got it. I'll check the desks and the rest of this room, if you want to check one of the other rooms." Clint seemed to understand the seriousness of the situation after the little scolding Natasha just gave him. She just nodded and walked towards one other door in the room.

When she opened the door, her breath hitched in her throat. The chair with the handcuffs attached to it, the syringe on the floor, the metal table with the restraints... But what hit her hard, was the overpowering smell of blood. Looking closely, she could see the three distinct stains on the concrete floor.

The room where Alexandra...

Natasha swallowed hard and did her best to put those memories out of her mind as she stepped into the room. She walked over and knelt down to pick up the syringe. It was a great find, and it looked like a little bit of the serum was still in the tube. She hoped Bruce would be able to figure out what components it was made of.

"Whatcha got there?" Clint's voice drifted in from the doorway. Natasha stood up and spun around to face him.

"The syringe they used on Alexandra." She replied.

"You mean... This is...?" Clint trailed off as he looked around the room. Natasha nodded and slipped past him and shut the door. "Hey..." He put his hand on her shoulder to stop her.

"What is it?" She turned to face him.

"I've known you for a long time. I've never seen anything effect you like this." Clint let his hand drop to his side. Natasha sighed and shrugged.

"I don't know, Clint." She admitted. "This girl just got caught up in something she had no idea she was getting involved in. I guess I can kind of relate in a way." Natasha tucked the syringe away and the pair was silent for a few moments. "Did you find anything here?" She changed the subject.

"Found some files that looked important." He replied, patting his vest. "Seems like something Bruce and Tony would be able to make sense of." Natasha nodded once.

"Then let's get back to them."

* * *

"So, the base is Erskine's formula and the addition is Zola's alteration of it." Bruce explained as he and Tony paced the lab. "I just can figure out what the unknown part of it is." The frustration was obvious in his voice.

"It's an amped up version of both serums mixed into one." Tony summed up. The two scientists did their best thinking out loud. "She's got a combo of powers from both super soldiers. It's like she's their love child, or something."

"Who knows what other powers she has that she doesn't know about?" Bruce said nervously as he glanced at the display.

_68% Complete_

"Let's worry about that later." Tony said, clearly not wanting to open that can of worms just yet. He wasn't sure about Bruce, but he had a nagging worry in the back of his mind that Alex might start showing symptoms of turning into another green giant. One Hulk was tough enough...

"Captain Rogers is approaching." Jarvis spoke up. Tony and Bruce looked towards the door as it opened and saw Steve enter the lab.

"Anything new?" He asked, wanting to get right to the point. Bruce opened his mouth, but Tony beat him to it.

"She got a pumped up version of you, mixed with a...most likely, healthy dose of the bionic man." He summed up, twirling a pen between his fingers.

"This isn't funny, Tony." Steve scowled at him. "She's like a time bomb right now. There's no telling what she's capable of." Bruce took a step forward.

"The base formula is what Erskine used on you. The addition is from Zola's modified version that was used on James." He explained. "That's all we know right now. My equipment couldn't read what else was used. We're trying to figure it out now." Steve looked down and a heavy sigh escaped his lips.

"Agents Barton and Romanoff are on their way down, Sir. They seem eager to show you and Dr. Banner something." Jarvis piped up. The three men in the room exchanged curious glances before the door flew open.

"Bruce! Tony!" Natasha exclaimed as she walked in with Clint trailing close behind her. "We found something that may help." She reached behind her and pulled out a small plastic case and handed it to Bruce. Clint reached into his vest and pulled out an envelope and handed it to Tony.

"Where were you guys? What is that?" Steve asked as he watched the two scientists take what they were handed.

"A used syringe. Just what I always wanted..." Bruce looked at Natasha and raised an eyebrow.

"It's the syringe they used on Alexa." She replied. The room fell into a tense silence for a few moments. "We were...at the building..." Natasha trailed off, not needing to say anymore.

"The serum!" Bruce widened his eyes and immediately scrambled to put it through the analyzer.

"So, Bruce gets a syringe and I get some papers? You guys must not like me that much." Tony sulked as he pulled the papers out of the envelope.

"They looked like they were right up your alley." Clint replied. Tony's expression changed quickly as he looked through the papers. His eyes were wide and he furrowed his brows in confusion.

"What is it, Stark?" Steve asked. Bruce was busy in the background and Clint and Natasha fixed their gaze on Tony. He finally looked up from the papers with a strange look on his face.

"They're not trying to make _replicas_ of us. They're trying to make us, _exactly_." He said.

"Meaning...?" Steve asked, crossing his arms across his chest.

"This is like, Twilight Zone weird." Tony muttered, shaking his head.

"Tony!" Clint shouted, snapping the billionaire's attention back to them. "What is it?"

* * *

"Wanna talk about your dream?" Bucky asked. He and Alexandra were just snuggling next to each other on the bed. His arm draped around her shoulder as she leaned against him.

"I dunno." Alex shrugged. "It's weird, though. I remember reading something about people only dream about people that they know. But," she paused and looked up at Bucky, "I didn't recognize _anyone_ in my dream..."

"What happened in the dream?" Bucky asked, shifting position to face Alex. "Do you remember it?" Alex nodded and tucked some hair behind her ear.

"There was a room full of people. They looked like scientists. Except for one. He was dressed in some sort of combat gear." Alex began. Bucky remained quiet, but his lips were pressed into a hard line. "He seemed like he was in charge. There was a huge tube in the middle of the room, filled with some sort of liquid. Inside, was a naked man. He was hooked up to a lot of tubes that led to several different machines. The scientists looked like they were monitoring his vitals." She chewed on the inside of her lip.

"What did the man look like?" Bucky asked. Alex could hear the faint tone of concern in his voice. She rubbed her fingers over her lips as she tried to recall.

"He was tall. Had slick backed hair that looked almost greasy. Blue eyes, I think. He was really muscular and well built, and had five o'clock shadow like crazy." She replied. "Why?" Bucky didn't answer. "What's wrong?" She put her hand on his arm and stared at him.

"Hang on a second." Bucky got off the bed and headed towards the closet. Way in the back, was a box filled with the Winter Soldier's things. Alex didn't like that he kept them, but he said they reminded him of what he never wanted to become again.

"What are you looking for?" She asked as she slid off the bed and stood next to him. Bucky didn't reply. He just turned around with a few folders in his hands and dropped them on the bed. "What is this, babe?" Alex placed her fingertips on one of the folders.

"Is this the guy you saw?" Bucky asked as he opened on the folders and pulled out a picture. Alex took it from him and stared at it in disbelief.

"Y-yeah... This is him." She confirmed after a few moments. "Who...who is he?" Bucky took the picture and put it back in the folder, but left it open on the bed and pushed it to Alex. She picked it up and looked over the papers inside.

"He's Jack Rollins. Part of Hydra." Bucky replied as he sat down on the edge of the bed with a heavy sigh. "He and Rumlow were both part of SHIELD when the helicarriers went down and all that. After the collapse of HQ, Rollins disappeared."

"How did you get this file?" Alex asked. Bucky glanced up at her with a 'please don't ask' look. She bit her lip and nodded, then put the folder down.

"Anyway, he and Rumlow were...uh, around when I was...trained." Bucky said, trying to hide the pain in his voice. Alex picked up another folder and opened it. Her jaw dropped and she gasped. "What is it?" Bucky stood up suddenly.

"Who...Who is this?" Alex asked, her hands shaking as she picked up the picture. Bucky took the picture from her as she dropped the folder on the bed.

"This is Rumlow. Before the accident." He said. "Why? What's wrong?" Alex pointed at the picture with a shaking finger.

"That's...That's him. That's the guy in my dream." She whispered. Bucky furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

"Honey, you just told me that _Rollins_ was the guy in your dream." He put his hands on her shoulders. Alex shook her head.

"No, I know what I said." She replied. "I'm talking about the guy _in the tube_. It was Rumlow. I'm _positive_." Alex started to panic.

"Calm down, baby! It was just a dream." Bucky hugged her close against him.

"No. No! It didn't...feel like a dream, Bucky." Alex shook her head, but made no attempt to break free from his embrace. "It felt... _real_. Like...Like I was there in the room with them." She took a breath and tried to calm herself.

The door to the bedroom flew open, revealing Steve with a panicked look on his face.

"Guys, we have a serious problem." He said. Bucky looked at him and sighed.

"Join the club, Steve." He replied. "Can it wait? I'm kind of dealing with something right now." Alex slowly lifted her head and locked eyes with Steve.

"Oh, sure. I'll make sure to tell our _clones_ to wait until our schedules clear up."


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alexandra discovers something alarming, then Bruce explains to Bucky and Steve what he found in the serum she was injected with.

"Wh-what?" Alexandra blinked in shock a few times.

"Steve, this isn't funny. I'm in the middle of - "

"This isn't a joke, Buck! I'm dead serious." Steve interrupted him. Alex stepped away from Bucky and stared at Steve in disbelief.

"Clones? That's ridiculous!" Bucky exclaimed. "Even for Hydra..."

"It's not ridiculous, Bucky." Alex spoke up. Steve looked at her. "My dream..." She locked yes with Bucky. "It makes sense... What I dreamed about."

"Doll, that was a _dream_." Bucky sighed, trying to make sense of everything. What the hell sort of crazy shit was going on now? "It wasn't real!" Alex shook her head.

"But I - "

"It was just a dream, baby." Bucky interrupted. "Sometimes people have lucid dreams and they feel like reality." He explained.

"Baby, you're not listening. I - " Alex tried to interject, but Bucky didn't want to seem to listen.

"It was just a weird fluke thing. It happens." Bucky rambled. Steve looked frustrated.

"Bucky, please - " She tried again. When he cut her off, yet again, she could feel herself starting to get frustrated.

"Clones, Steve? I mean, really!" He threw his hands up in the air. Alex clenched her hands into fists at her sides.

"Bucky. I know it makes no sense, but it's true." Steve protested.

"I think my dream - " Alex began.

"It was just a dream, Alexandra! Clones don't - "

_"LISTEN TO ME, DAMMIT!"_ Alex screamed. Steve and Bucky jumped and took a step backwards. At the same moment, the three of them heard the sound of glass shattering. Bucky spun around and saw pieces of the mirror in the bathroom falling into the sink. He slowly turned his head and stared at Alexandra with wide eyes.

The trio stayed silent for a good thirty seconds. No one knew what had just happened, or even what to say.

"Did... Did I...do that?" Alex whispered. Her hands were shaking and there was obvious fear in her voice.

"It... It must have just been a coincidence." Bucky replied, but his tone said otherwise. Steve swallowed nervously but didn't speak. Hurried footsteps echoed as they got louder and closer to the three of them.

"What was that noise?" Bruce asked as he stood just behind Steve.

"You heard it, right?" Clint piped up.

"Everyone OK?" Natasha stepped to the front and scanned the faces of the trio.

"Uh... Well..." Steve fumbled over his words, obviously trying to come up with some lie.

"It was me." Alex interrupted. Steve shot her a 'what the hell are you doing?' look over his shoulder. "I screamed to get Steve and Bucky to listen to me. Sorry about that." She apologized. The three in the doorway didn't look fully convinced, but they dropped it.

"Uh, well..." Bruce seemed to have trouble getting his words out. "Could I speak to you both for a moment?" He finally asked, eying Steve and Bucky. Alex furrowed her brows at him.

"What about me?" She asked curiously, wrapping her arm around Bucky's.

"You," Natasha stepped towards her as she spoke, "get to come with me." She grabbed Alex's hand and smiled.

"Um... Alright." Alex reluctantly agreed, slipping away from Bucky as Natasha led her out of the room.

"What's going on?" Bucky asked once he heard them leave the floor.

"We've got a problem." Clint replied.

"I know. Steve told me about the clones." Bucky replied. Bruce shook his head.

"No. No, this has to deal with Miss Chase." He informed them. Steve folded his arms across his chest. "The syringe that Natasha gave me? I ran it through Tony's new machine."

"What syringe?" Bucky asked. Bruce hesitated, not wanting to explain.

"Natasha and Clint went to...where we rescued Alexa. They found some things that might help." Steve said in a low voice. "They found the syringe that had the serum in it they used on her..." He trailed off, not needing to say any more. Bucky clenched his fists at the memory, but took a breath.

"What did you find out?" He turned his attention to Bruce.

"The base was, like I said, a mix of the two different serums that were used on you both. But there were other elements that I couldn't isolate. I couldn't figure out what they were." Bruce stated. "When I ran it through Tony's new machine, I found out what they were. They're elements... Compounds."

"Alright... So?" Steve prodded.

"They don't exist. They're not _supposed_ to exist." Bruce finished, throwing his hands up in confusion and frustration.

"Wait, what the hell? What do you mean they don't exist?" Steve let his hands drop to his sides. Bucky stood silently, absorbing everything and wondering if these added elements were the reason Alexandra was having such a terrible time lately.

"I don't _know_ , Steve!" Bruce exclaimed as he paced a line near the door. "All I know, is that the elements I found are extremely dangerous. They're damn near impossible to control. I don't know how they came to be. I sure as hell don't know how Hydra was able to create them!" The doctor had his hands balled into fists at his sides.

"Alright... Alright." Steve walked over to Bruce and put a hand on his shoulder to calm him down. "Do you know what these elements are supposed to do?" He asked. Bruce nodded.

"I found Celon and Neladic in the serum. They're both elements that are thought to have an effect on the subject's mental state." He said, rubbing his temples. Bucky tensed, but remained quiet.

"What kind of effect?" Steve asked.

"It depends. They can either give the subject certain powers, or..."

"Or what?" Steve prodded. Bruce sighed heavily.

"Or... It can cause a mental break." Bucky suddenly stepped forward.

"What kind of powers?" He asked, glaring down at the scientist. Bruce took a step back to keep some distance between them.

"Uh, well... Any kind of mental powers, really." Bruce shrugged. "Telepathy, telekinesis, mental manipulation, premonitions... The list goes on." Bucky turned around and walked towards the bed, the two files still laid out.

"Premonitions..." He mumbled as he pulled the folders towards him.

"Bucky? What's the matter?" Steve asked. "What are those?"

"I showed these to Alexandra before you guys came." Bucky opened the folders and stepped aside to show Steve and Bruce. "She had a...strange dream about a bunch of people standing around a naked man in a tube."

"What?" Steve asked in confusion. "What the hell kind of dream is that?"

"I don't know. But she pointed out these two." Bucky motioned to the pictures. Steve merely glanced down, but Bruce picked up the pictures to get a better look.

"Who are they?" He asked before putting them down again.

"Part of Hydra. Jack Rollins and Brock Rumlow." Steve replied with anger in his voice. He turned to Bucky. "She picked them out right away?" He asked.

"No." Bucky said. "She described Rollins and I showed her the picture to confirm it was who I thought. With Rumlow..."

"Did she recognize him?" Steve pursed his lips together.

"Yes. But not like that."

"What do you mean?" Bruce spoke up again.

"You know him. Just not in that way." Bucky turned his back on the two of them. When he didn't speak again, Steve explained for him.

"Rumlow was the man with the scarred face. Remember when Ethan contacted us after he kidnapped Alexa? Rumlow was with him." Bruce's eyes widened.

" _THIS_ is him? This is who she saw in her dream?" Bucky merely nodded.

"She didn't know it was him because she only knew him with his scarred face." He sighed. "And...he was the man in the tube."

"OK. I don't understand what's going on." Steve shook his head and threw his hands up. "Why is Alexa having dreams about people she's never even seen before? How did Hydra create these dangerous elements? Why did they put them in a serum? Why are they making clones of us? What was that weird thing with the mirror?" He rambled off questions as he paced.

"What thing with the mirror?" Bruce asked curiously. He looked past Steve and noticed the broken mirror for the first time. Bucky shot Steve a 'seriously, dude?!' look before sighing.

"When Alexandra said she screamed at us...she wasn't lying. She screamed so loud, and the mirror just broke." Bucky said, rubbing his temples. "I...think it was just a coincidence." He added, but his tone suggested otherwise.

"I don't think it was." Bruce said. "I don't think any of this is mere coincidence."

"Then what is it?" Steve asked with agitation.

"I think it's pretty obvious, now." He stared at Steve with an expression that silently told the soldier to stop denying the truth. The three of them stood silently in the bedroom for several moments.

"She..." Steve sighed and looked down. "She has powers. Doesn't she?" Bruce nodded slowly. Bucky sat down on the edge of the bed and held his head in his hands.

"Are these powers going to kill her?" He whispered. Slowly, he brought his gaze up to meet the doctor's eyes.

"They shouldn't..." Bruce trailed off and cast his gaze downwards.

"But...?" Steve urged him to continue.

"She's...in for a rough road ahead. We all have to help get her through it in one piece." He explained. "Celon and Neladic weren't the only two elements I found in the serum."


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The hits just keep coming for Alex...

"What's going on you guys?" Alexandra asked as Clint and Natasha guided her into the library and sat down. Natasha motioned for her to sit down. She had a reassuring smile on her lips.

"Bruce wanted to talk to Steve and James about something." She said.

"About me." Alex more stated than asked.

"You catch on quick." Clint replied. Natasha shot him a glare and he looked away, embarrassed at having been scolded. Alex sighed and collapsed onto the couch.

"I know I'm young, but I'm not a child. Why are you guys treating me like I am?" She asked sadly.

"It's not that." Natasha shook her head. "You're just in a tough place right now and we don't want you to be burdened with more than you can handle." She explained. Alex shrugged but remained silent. Her mind wandered back to when she screamed and the mirror broke. Was it really a coincidence? She was having a hard time convincing herself that it was...

_...can't believe she's lasted this long... shit in the serum...killed her by now..._

"What?" Alex asked, looking between Nat and Clint. They both looked at her curiously.

"What's wrong?" Natasha asked.

"What about the stuff in the serum? Is it bad?" She asked nervously.

"What do you mean? We're still trying to figure it out." Natasha reassured her. Alex shook her head.

"Did you just say something about me lasting so long? And that all the stuff in the serum should have killed me by now?" She asked the red-head. A look of shock briefly flashed across her features before she regained her composure.

"I think you're just tired. Sometimes people hear things when they're tired, you know?" Natasha tried to convince her. Alex acted like she believed the spy. "Do you want something to drink? I'm a bit thirsty." She suggested. Alex shrugged again and nodded.

"Just water." She said softly as she stared down at her lap.

"You got it." Natasha replied. She looked at Clint and motioned for him to follow her to the kitchen.

"What's up?" He asked once they were away from Alex.

"I don't know how, but...I think..." Natasha looked down the hallway to where the library was. "I think...Alex read my mind."

"What? Come on, Nat. You can't be serious..." Clint shook his head. Natasha glared at him, adamant about her suspicion.

"That whole business with the serum? I was _thinking it_ right before she mentioned it!" The red-head ran her hands through her hair. "We have to tell the others. We have to be extremely careful until we get everything sorted out."

"You go tell them. I'll go back and give Alex her water. I'll just act like nothing's wrong. It'll be fine." Clint said. Natasha opened her mouth to object, but Clint wasn't having it. "Just go!" He urged her. Natasha sighed and nodded before heading off to Bucky's room. Clint took a breath before he headed back into the library with Alex, water bottle in hand.

"Thanks." She said when he handed it to her. "Where's Natasha?"

"She went to go see how much longer the guys were going to be." Clint lied as convincingly as he could. "How you holding up?" He asked. Alex took a drink before she replied.

"I...I don't know." She admitted with a sigh. "I feel...empty." Clint paced the room a little before leaning against the door frame.

"I think we've all felt like that before." He replied softly. He was trying his best to be supportive, and Alex appreciated it. Especially since they had a bit of a rocky relationship.

"If you say so..." She gave him a weak smile before taking another drink. She stood up suddenly and headed towards the door.

"What's wrong?" Clint asked her. Alex shook her head.

"Nothing. I just want to see what's taking them so long." She said. Clint blocked the doorway.

"They should be done soon. Don't worry." He was trying to get her to sit back down. She would find out about everything when the time was right.

"Clint, please." Alex stepped to the side, but he mirrored her and continued to block the door.

"Everything's fine, Alex. They'll be done soon. Just drink some more water." Alex sighed in frustration.

"Get out of the way, Clint." She demanded, not in the mood to be kept in the dark. Clint shook his head and remained in the doorway.

"Calm down, Alex. Just sit down and relax, OK?" He suggested, putting his hands on her shoulders to try and guide her back to the couch. Alex shrugged him off her and tried to slip past him again. Clint was a little faster and pushed her back a few steps. Alex regained her balance and glared menacingly at the archer.

"Get out of my way..." Alex growled lowly. Her eyes narrowed at him, but he didn't budge.

"Calm down, Alex." Clint repeated, trying to remain calm himself. Alex took a breath and balled her hands into fists at her sides. "Please..." He did his best to get Alex to listen, but she was determined to find out what was taking Natasha so long. They were hiding something... That much she could tell.

"I said... _MOVE!_ " Alex shouted, throwing her hand up and pointing at Clint. With a surprised yelp, the archer flew backwards and slid across the floor of the main lounge area until he was stopped by the couch. Alex looked at him with wide eyes before she took a few hurried steps towards him.

Clint was up in a flash. He grabbed his bow from the side of the couch and quickly pulled an arrow out of the quiver. Alex found herself staring at a readied arrow, with the bow string pulled all the way back.

"Clint, please! I'm sorry! I didn't - " Alex pleaded. She was just as confused as Clint appeared to be. He seemed to be staring at the young girl as if she wasn't human. Alex wondered if maybe...she wasn't anymore.

"Stop, Alex! Just, stop!" He barked at her. Alex bit her lower lip nervously. "What are you...?" There was a tense silence that hung in the air before Alex broke it.

"I don't know..." She whispered.

"Stop!" He ordered. "You're going to hurt someone. And I can't have that." Clint said before letting the arrow fly towards her. Alex screamed and held her hands up in front of her face to protect herself. She squeezed her eyes shut and braced for the pain. At that moment, Bucky, Steve, Natasha, and Bruce rushed into the room.

"Alexandra!" Bucky yelled out. The four heroes stood frozen where they entered and Alex slowly opened her eyes and lowered her hands. The arrow was frozen in the air, mere inches from her chest. Alex gasped softly as she stared at the levitating arrow.

"Wh...What...?" Her voice was soft and shaky as she stepped back a few feet. Bucky hurried over to her and snatched the arrow from its frozen state. He wrapped his arms around Alex and held her tightly for a good half minute. The entire room was silent.

"What's happening to me?"


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alexandra's sudden display of increasing power prompts the Avengers to take quick action.

"What were you thinking, Barton?!" Steve chastised the archer in the lounge after Bucky and Alexandra headed downstairs to the lab.

"It was a tranq arrow! Just to knock her out! What's the big deal?!" Clint threw his hands up.

"That's not the point, Clint. We don't attack each other!" Natasha exclaimed. "The world looks to us for protection. How do you think they would feel if we were fighting _each other_?" She asked. Clint sighed heavily and shrugged.

"I...I don't know. I wasn't thinking." He rubbed his temples and stared at the floor. Steve stared at him, his jaw tense and arms folded across his chest. Clint looked up and shook his head. "Sorry, Cap."

"I think Alexandra deserves your apology more than me." He replied before turning his attention to Natasha. "Nat, what exactly happened before that?"

"The three of us had taken her into the other room. I was thinking about how she could possibly still be alive with all the...whatever is inside her. And she... _heard_ it...somehow." The red head gave Steve the cliff-notes.

"After Nat went to get you guys, she threw me across the room like I was a balled up piece of paper. Then froze that arrow mid-air." Clint interjected.

"Telepathy and telekinesis." Natasha muttered. "What else is happening to her?"

"She had...some sort of vision. While she slept. She had a dream about Rollins and Rumlow. Something that pretty much confirms the theory about clones, I'd say." Steve said.

"I still can't believe that's what they want to do." Clint shook his head. "It's just so...completely out there."

"Banner," Steve suddenly turned his attention to the scientist, "you said you found other compounds in the serum? What are they? What do they do?" Bruce sighed.

"There was a cocktail of compounds in the serum. I don't know how they were able to synthesize them and have them not react badly with each other." Bruce explained. The air in the room was tense as the others waited for him to continue. "Sariur, Narbidum, Reinc, Baloum, Cechnsium, and Subsiel. In addition to Celon and Neladic." He rattled off several compounds, and everyone but Tony gave him puzzled looks.

"Can you please explain what the hell they do?" Clint asked, a sense of urgency in his voice.

"They're various compounds that grant abilities to the subject. The ones I just said, they grant physical, mental, and manipulative abilities." He said.

"So she could wipe us all out if she wanted to, is what you're saying." Clint surmised. Bruce shook his head.

"Maybe not. We don't know what kind of powers she has. Aside from what we've already witnessed. We shouldn't assume that she has immense and god-like powers." He explained. "For all we know, she could have these few active powers and the rest are passive. Like accelerated healing, or an adaptive physiology."

"And how are we supposed to figure it out? Push her buttons until she snaps and displays another power?" Clint asked. Steve shot him a glare. "What, Steve? Do you have any better ideas?" He asked. Steve sighed and looked down.

"Maybe Clint's right." Natasha spoke up. Everyone brought their attention to her. "I mean, we don't need to push her buttons and get her riled up. But we do have a bunker under the tower. We could... Maybe have some kind of session down there?" She suggested. Tony raised an eyebrow at her.

"That's...actually not a bad idea." He said. "Think about it. That bunker was built to try and contain Hulk."

"Yeah, and look how well that worked out." Bruce replied quickly. "What if she has powers stronger than that? She could completely destroy the tower." He said.

"There's...really only one way to find out." Steve sighed. "It's the only plan we have. And do we really want her to find out she has other incredible powers outside, where she could possibly put civilians in danger?" Bruce looked down, and everyone remained silent.

"...OK." He finally conceded. "We really don't have another option." He brought his gaze up to Steve. "You should be the one to tell them." The soldier nodded silently before heading downstairs to where Bucky and Alexandra were.

* * *

"Bucky, I'm scared." Alexandra said, her hands shaking. "I don't know what's happening. I feel...dangerous. And not in a good way." She bit her lip and paced a short line. _I wish I had a gun. I could end this now...before I hurt anyone._ The thought seemed to come out of nowhere.

"Alexa." Steve's voice drifted from the doorway. Alex turned to face him. "So, there's no delicate way to put this," he began. Bucky braced himself for devastating news, "Banner found...several compounds in the serum that have the ability to give certain powers." He explained. Alexandra furrowed her brows in confusion.

"So..." Alex prodded him to continue, despite the fact that she had a feeling she knew what he was going to say. Bucky stayed unusually quiet, his eyes glued to Steve.

"You have other powers that you don't know about. And...there's no way to know what they are until they manifest. So..." Steve took a breath and glanced at Bucky. He clenched his hands into fists. "We decided that...it would be best - or safest - to..." Steve looked down and flexed his hands into fists before releasing them.

"You're going to keep me in the bunker in the basement." Alexandra sighed. Steve brought his attention back up to her, a look of surprise on his face. Bucky quickly stood up from his chair.

"What?!" He exclaimed.

"Bucky, don't." Alex put her hand on his shoulder to calm him.

"Did you just read my thoughts?" Steve asked. He knew that Natasha had mentioned that earlier. But it was different when it actually happened. Alex nodded, feeling ashamed.

"I'm sorry. I...I don't know how to turn it off." She apologized. "I could just see how hard it was for you to say." Bucky placed his hand over Alex's.

"Steve, we can't just keep her down there like she's some kind of animal." Bucky said.

"We won't." Steve reassured him. "It'll just be for a few hours a day. It's the only idea we could think of to figure out what other abilities she has." He explained. Alex felt Bucky relax slightly.

"I can't hurt anyone down there?" Alex asked. Steve nodded.

"The bunker was built to contain Hulk." He said. "It's strong and solid." _Hopefully she doesn't have any abilities that strong..._ Alex heard Steve's thought, but didn't say anything about it.

"Well, I don't see any other way to figure this out. But, can we start tomorrow?" She suggested. "It's...been a hell of a day. For everyone, I think." Alex forced a laugh, trying to lighten the mood. Steve smiled slightly and nodded.

 _At least she still has her sense of humor._ She heard him think. It made her smile at him before he left the room. Alex brought her attention to Bucky. He'd been so quiet, and it worried her.

"Bucky?" She stepped in front of him and stared into his eyes. "Are you OK? You've been so quiet."

 _...kill every last one of them. Rumlow is going to suffer like he made Alexandra suffer._ The thought played over and over in Bucky's head. Alex placed her hands on the sides of his face.

"Bucky..." She whispered softly. Bucky blinked several times before he was able to focus on Alexandra. "Hey. Don't worry. We'll get through this." She told him.

"I'm sorry." He apologized and held her hands in his as he pulled her close to him. "I wish I could fix this." Alex looked up at him.

"It does suck." She agreed. "But, I wouldn't change it for anything. Because..." She paused and blushed. "This whole situation brought me to you." Bucky looked down at her and smiled.

"I love you, doll." He said before kissing her forehead. Alex smiled and hugged him tightly.

* * *

Alexandra had endless nightmares that night. She couldn't tell if she was having premonitions, or if her mind was just subconsciously trying to work through the crazy shit that had happened during the day.

_"Alex." Amy breathed a sigh of relief. Before the two of them realized it, they were wrapped in each other's arms. Alex squeezed her as tightly as she could. "Breathing! It's still something I do!" She choked out. Alex released her death grip hug on the girl and smiled at her._

_"Amy... Amy, I've missed you so much! I...can't believe this is happening!" Alex squealed. Amy smiled back at her. "So much has happened. I wanted to talk to you for so long, but Ethan wouldn't let me." She eagerly explained, hoping her friend would forgive her. "He was such an asshole. I don't know what I ever saw in him." She shook her head and looked down._

_"Alex." Amy repeated, her tone suddenly changed. Alex looked up. The smile gone from Amy's face, she looked...angry. "You left me." She said lowly. Alex took a step back._

_"I...I know. I didn't want to! I just...made some bad decisions..." She admitted sadly._

_"You left **us**." Amy practically growled, taking a step towards Alex. The brunette stared at her friend in shock._

_"...Us?" She asked in confusion. "What are you talking about?" Alex felt her heart start to pound and her hands shake. Amy reached behind her back and Alex instinctively took a step back. When Amy's hand came back into view, she was holding a very sharp looking knife._

_"Come back to us, Alex. We miss you." Amy's tone was almost mocking._

_"Woah! Amy! What the hell?!" Alex exclaimed. She held her hands up as if she was surrendering. Amy smirked and took a fake step towards Alex, which made the frightened woman jump back. She felt herself collide with something and she spun around. Her heart jumped into her throat and she nearly collapsed._

_"Hey beautiful."_

_"No..." Alex whispered in horror. "Not...Not you!" She turned to run, but something jerked hard against her ankle and sent her crashing to the floor. Alex turned to look, and saw a chain connected to the floor that wrapped around both her ankles._

_"Won't you stay a while?" Amy mocked her. She knelt down in front of her and held the knife under her chin. "After all, we've got so much to catch up on." She smiled. Alex was breathing heavy in a panic. She felt two hands lift her up off the floor, and she struggled to free herself._

_"Get off me! I'll kill you again, and make sure it sticks!" She screamed. The laugh he responded with seemed to echo off the walls of the room. Alex looked around, suddenly realizing where she was._

_The disgustingly grimy room where Ethan and Rumlow tortured her. Her heart felt like it was going to beat right out of her chest. Her gaze fell to the man standing before her. She wanted to punch the smirk right off his stupid face._

_"Well come on, then." Rumlow taunted her. Alex balled her hands into fists and jerked her foot forward to break the chain. It rattled noisily against the concrete floor. She looked down in confusion and jerked her other foot forward. The chain wouldn't break._

_"What the hell is this? What did you do to me?!" She cried out, turning back to Rumlow. He chuckled softly._

_"Me? I didn't do anything to you, princess." He replied with an arrogant smile. "No matter how powerful you are, you will always be powerless against me." Amy stood beside him, casually twirling the knife in her hands._

_"Amy, please." Alex begged her friend. "I'm sorry! I didn't want to leave you! Don't you know that?!" She protested._

_"Shut up!" Amy snapped, thrusting the knife towards Alex as a threat. "You've always been a selfish little bitch. And now you have the nerve to pretend to be the victim?" She said in disgust. Alex took a small step back, wounded by her words. She was shocked into silence._

_"Speechless? That's a first." Rumlow raised an eyebrow, slightly surprised. He raised his hand and ran it through Amy's hair, as if to display affection for her. Alexandra cast her gaze downwards, at a complete loss for words and actions._

_"This is just a dream... There's...no other explanation..." She closed her eyes and whispered to herself. She repeated to herself that it was a dream, over and over._

_"If this is a dream, then why are you powerless to stop this?" Rumlow's voice was right against her ear, causing her to snap her eyes open and jump away in surprise. She turned to face Amy to plead with her again, only to be met with the sudden pain of the blade sinking into her side._

_"A...Amy...?" Alex gasped as she stared at her friend. She inhaled sharply as the red head jerked the blade out, letting drops of blood fall to the floor. Alex held her hand against her wound, putting pressure on it to slow the bleeding. She swayed back and forth, unsteady on her feet, before falling to the ground. The wounded girl held herself up with her free hand._

_"Do you have any idea what I went through after you left?" Amy asked angrily as she got down on her knees. She pressed the tip of the blade against Alex's chest and cut through the fabric of her shirt, making a shallow horizontal cut across her skin. Alex hissed in pain and leaned back to get away from the knife. She felt someone behind her, holding her in place. Two hands clasped around her neck and started to squeeze._

_"P-Please..." Alex wheezed. She brought both of her hands up and weakly pried against Rumlow's grip._

_"No." Amy growled as she effortlessly pushed Alex's hands away. "You're going to suffer like I did after you left me." She said as she stabbed Alex in the side again. Alex gasped and choked as she coughed up blood. A malicious smile spread across Amy's lips as she twisted the knife before pulling it out again. Rumlow let go of her neck and let her fall to the floor._

_"I'm...s-s-sorry.." Alex trembled on the floor, never taking her eyes off Amy._

_"It's too late for that." Amy replied coldly. Alex felt the familiar pain of the knife in her outer thigh. She whimpered loudly, her breathing was heavy and labored as blood collected underneath her._

_"Mn..." Alex could feel herself slipping into unconsciousness. "He-Help me... B-Bucky..."_

"Alexandra! Wake up!" Bucky exclaimed, holding her against him in bed. Alexandra snapped her eyes open and gasped several times. Suddenly, she felt herself falling. The bed crashed onto the floor, along with everything else in the room; dressers, nightstands, and lamps. She pulled herself away from Bucky and looked frantically around the room.

"Wh...What the hell?" She gasped before staring at Bucky. He pushed her hair out of her face and stared at her with concern.

"You were having a nightmare." He told her. "You...You were making everything levitate." Alex looked at him like he had three heads. However, the damage to the furniture backed up his claim. She sighed and buried her head into his chest.

"I'm sorry." She whispered. "You don't deserve to go through this."

"Shh..." Bucky held her close and ran his fingers through her hair. "You're the one who doesn't deserve to go through this hell."


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex goes through a simulation in the bunker.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: This chapter has violence, gore, and a near-rape situation.

Alexandra couldn't get back to sleep after that. She watched it get lighter and lighter outside, until Bucky eventually woke up next to her. She felt his hand on her cheek and she smiled as she turned to face him.

"Morning, doll." He said sleepily.

"Hey handsome." Alex replied. She sat up in bed and stretched. "I'm sorry about...I don't know. Fucking up the furniture." She sighed and looked down. Bucky sat up next to her.

"Hey, don't worry about it. Furniture can be replaced." He said as he gently cupped her chin and turned her head to to face him. "You can't." Alex smiled again and leaned forward to give him a quick kiss.

"I'm gonna get a shower, and then we can..." She sighed again. "Go down to the bunker and get this over with." Bucky held her hand inside both of his.

"You're gonna be fine. We'll be OK." He reassured her. Alex smiled weakly and placed her other hand on top of his.

 _I hope so._ "Yeah. I'm surrounded by super smart scientists and super strong heroes." She nodded. "And my amazing boyfriend." She couldn't help the blush that she felt spreading across her cheeks. Bucky chuckled softly.

"You're not so bad yourself." He joked. _I hope this makes her feel less nervous._ She heard him think.

"It does, actually." Alex replied without thinking. She instantly pursed her lips together and looked down again. "Dammit! I'm sorry." She looked up at him. "I'm sorry. Hopefully I can control this soon." Alex slipped her hand from Bucky's and rubbed her temples. "The last thing I want to do, is poke around in your mind. God knows you've had enough people doing that in the past." She gritted her teeth.

"Don't worry about that, Alexandra." Bucky gently placed his hand on her shoulder. "If anyone was able to poke around in my mind, I'd want it to be you." He smiled at her as she brought her eyes up to meet his. She laughed softly.

"Thanks, Bucky." Alex smiled. "I'm gonna get a shower before I poke around and find something you want to keep secret from me." She joked. Bucky smiled.

"I wouldn't keep secrets from you." He replied before kissing her cheek. Alex blushed again, then headed into the bathroom. Bucky got out of bed and threw on his clothes.

"Hey doll! I'm gonna head into the kitchen and grab something to eat!" He called out. They had yet to fix the door to the bathroom.

"OK! I won't be long!" Alex replied over the sound of the running water. Bucky headed out and closed the bedroom door behind him. He made his way to the kitchen, and found most everyone was already there. Tony and Thor couldn't be seen.

"Morning, guys." He said before grabbing an apple from the fruit bowl.

"Hey Buck. How's Alexa?" Steve asked. He was sitting at the counter with Natasha, Banner, and Clint. They were all picking at the food in front of them.

"She's...alright. As alright as she can be right now." He replied. "We had a rough night, though."

"What happened?" Natasha asked, turning in her chair.

"She had a nightmare, and made everything in the room levitate in her sleep." He explained. Bruce frowned and pushed his plate away, only having eaten about half of his food.

"Sounds like fear might be a trigger for her." He said. "Sergeant Barnes, we might have to use that during our tests..." Bucky sighed.

"I had a feeling you were going to say that." He replied before taking a bit of his apple.

"And anger." Steve interjected, recalling the incident when she screamed and broke the mirror.

"True. She seemed pretty pissed when she tossed me across the room." Clint agreed. Bucky took another bite of his apple and remained quiet. He didn't want to have to subject Alexandra to this. But, it seemed like it had to be done.

"Um, hey guys." A soft voice called out. Bucky turned around and saw Alexandra slowly making her way towards the kitchen. She avoided looking at anyone except Bucky.

"Hey Alexa." Steve greeted her, trying to relieve some of the tension in the room. She briefly made eye contact with him before sticking to Bucky's side. The room was quiet for a few moments.

"So, Miss Chase - " Bruce began.

"You don't have to keep calling me that, Dr. Banner." Alex interrupted. Bruce smiled slightly.

"Very well. I'll call you Alex, if you start calling me Bruce." He offered. Alex smiled and looked up at him with a nod. "OK. So, Alex, we'll head down to the bunker and you can meet us down there after you get something to eat." He explained. "If you want to, that is. I can explain more of what will happen down there."

"OK." Alex nodded. "Sounds good." The four Avengers stood up from their seats and all headed to the elevator. Alex waited until the doors shut to turn and face Bucky.

"I'm coming down with you." He said. Alex stared up at him, her heart thrumming with nervousness. She wanted Bucky with her, but she was scared about what might happen. What her powers might do. She was scared that Bucky would end up being scared of her.

"I don't want to hurt you, or end up scaring you away." She admitted quietly. Bucky wrapped his arms around her and held her close.

"Doll, you don't have to worry about that." He told her. "Trust me. I've seen my fair share of weird. It would take a hell of a lot to scare me away from you." He kissed the top of her head before releasing her. Alex smiled weakly at him again.

"Thank you..." She said softly. Bucky took another bite of his apple and smiled at her.

"Of course. Let me know when you wanna head down." He said. It might have looked like he was calm and collected on the outside, but inside he was a nervous wreck. With Alexandra's empathy, he was sure she could feel it. However, he still did his best to hide it. He didn't want to make her anymore nervous than she already was.

Fifteen minutes later, Alexandra had gotten a little food in her stomach and she and Bucky were headed down in the elevator. She watched the floor number change every few seconds, and her anxiety crept higher and higher. Her hands started shaking at her sides. Before she realized what she was doing, her hand had intertwined with Bucky's; still shaking.

"I'm scared." She whispered, gripping his hand tightly. Bucky looked at her and brushed some hair behind her ear.

"Oh, Alexandra..." Bucky wrapped his other arm around her, leaned down and kissed her. Alex felt her heart jump and it seemed like everything melted away around her. She reached up with her other hand and grabbed the fabric of his shirt. Bucky kissed her eagerly, hoping it would take her mind off some of the anxiety she was having. Alex smiled as she kissed him. After a few moments, she pulled away.

"Thank you." She laughed softly, feeling a bit less nervous than before. The elevator stopped moving and the doors opened. Alex took a deep breath and stepped out into the hallway with Bucky. She slipped her hand into his and he lead her down the hall. There were a few doors on each side of the hall, and a huge pair of double doors at the end.

The doors opened automatically when the pair got close, and Alex could feel her anxiety rising again. She gently squeezed Bucky's hand for comfort. The room inside was huge in width and height. Alex looked around, but didn't see anyone else. Suddenly, it seemed as if the wall beside them had opened up. Alex jumped back, startled.

"Hey, Alex." Natasha said as she walked towards her. Tony came out behind her, carrying something in his hand. "This is the bunker." She gestured to the room around her. "Tony did some modifications, with some help from a friend, and we can run simulations in here too." She explained.

"Can't let me take the credit, can you?" Tony asked as he stepped closer to Alex. Natasha smirked.

"Someone has to keep your ego in check when Pepper isn't around." She replied. Tony rolled his eyes, then brought his attention back to Alex. He had a small case in his hand, and opened it up. Alex saw a small bit of, what looked like, plastic inside it. Tony picked it up and held it in his hand.

"This," Tony held the little thing out for Alex to see, "is some new tech that we'll be using. We can run a simulation, no problem. But you'll know in your mind that it's fake." He explained. "This little baby will manipulate each of the lobes in your brain, so that you'll believe it's real. And, you'll act accordingly." He said.

"Is...Is that safe?" Alex asked nervously. "I mean, has it been tested before?"

"Completely. And yes. On me." Tony replied, holding the little device out for Alex to take. "And look, I'm still completely fine." Alex raised an eyebrow at him and took it from his hand.

"That's...debatable." She retorted with a slight smirk. Natasha half smiled. "Where does it go?" She asked.

"It affixes to the neck, at the base of the brain stem." Tony said. Alex reached over her shoulder, and pressed the device against her skin. No sooner than she take her hand away, an electric shock suddenly pulsed through her body. She jerked forward involuntarily and felt two hands grab her shoulders to steady her.

"Jesus, Stark! You couldn't warn me?" She asked, shaking her head to clear her mind. Alex looked at Tony and saw him smirking at her. "Ass." She laughed softly.

"So, we'll be behind the wall here and we can monitor everything that happens." He said. "We've got your vitals from that, too. So don't worry. We'll shut it down if things start getting too out of hand." Alex nodded and looked at Bucky. His expression was serious, but she could tell he was extremely worried.

"Alex," Bruce spoke up from the door-wall, "we'll also be able to see everything you do." His statement made Alex swallow nervously.

"Great... All my demons on display for everyone to see." She sighed. Bucky wrapped his arms around her. "I can do this..." She breathed softly before Bucky reluctantly released her. "It's just like using a VR headset. I can do this." Alex figured if she told it to herself enough times, she'd eventually believe it.

"If you're ready, we can get started." Bruce said. Alex looked up at Bucky, then at Bruce, and nodded as she took a deep breath. Bucky stared at her for a few moments, then turned and headed through the door-wall.

_Love you._

"Love you, too." She replied. Bucky looked over his shoulder at her, and smiled slightly. Once he was through, the door shut and Alex was alone.

"OK, Alex." A voice came over a speaker. Alex looked around, but didn't see from where. She recognized it as Bruce. "We're going to start a simulation in ten seconds. Alright?" Alex nodded before she found her voice.

"Y-yes!" Her voice cracked, and her heart was pounding.

"Ten...nine...eight..." Bruce began counting down, and Alex looked around her. Nothing was changing so far. "Seven...six...five...four..." Alex took a deep breath and closed her eyes. "Three...two...one..." Bruce's voice faded away, and Alex didn't want to open her eyes.

"Get up, you useless bitch!" A familiar voice hissed. The next the she knew, she felt a throbbing pain in her side. Her eyes snapped open, and she wrapped her arms around herself. Her surroundings were familiar, if only sideways for the moment. Alex rolled on to her back and stared at the ceiling of the apartment.

 _Please, no... No more._ She begged in her mind. David towered over her, leering down with a look of disgust on his face.

"The sooner you admit it, the easier this will be." He replied, yanking her to her feet by her wrists. Alex cried out as pain shot through her side.

"David, please!" She pleaded. "I'm sorry!" Alex felt her heart pounding as she stared at him. "He was just helping me!" It was useless to try and explain the situation. David only believed what he wanted to believe.

"I don't wanna hear your excuses, you dumb whore!" David replied with a rough backhand to Alex's face. Her head jerked to the side and she yelped in pain. She held her free hand against her stinging cheek and tears started to well up in her eyes.

"Please! You know I love you!" Alex cried out as she brought her gaze back to David again.

"Oh you do, do you?" He replied in a mocking tone. "Kinda hard to believe that when I see that asshole with you every time I'm not around." He pushed Alex on the shoulders, and she stumbled backwards.

"Are you kidding me?" Alex exclaimed. "He was just helping me carry the laundry!" She protested. Her words fell on deaf ears as David brought his hand up and smacked her in the face again. Alex literally saw stars as she fell against the wall.

"Don't pull that bullshit on me." David hissed. "First it's 'he's just helping me with the laundry', then it'll be 'he's just helping me fuck myself'."

"I don't...Steve's just a...friend!" Alex replied as her vision slowly returned to normal. David grabbed her wrist and jerked her towards him. He didn't speak, just stared at her with harsh, cold eyes. Without letting go of her wrist, David walked into the bedroom practically dragging Alex behind him.

"You wanna act like a slut? Fine." He said harshly before pushing Alex down on the bed.

"David, don't!" Alex yelped, scurrying to the other side of the bed. He ignored her and grabbed a hold of her ankle before pulling her back to him. He quickly grabbed a hold of her shirt and ripped it open, exposing her bra.

"Shut up, you stupid bitch." He growled at her. Alex felt her panic rising and her heartbeat seemed to pound in her ears. She wildly kicked and swung her fists in a vain attempt to fend him off. She felt her fist collide with something, and she saw David hold his hand up to his jaw. Her eyes went wide with horror.

"I-I'm sorry!" She immediately apologized. David brought his harsh gaze to her and balled his hand into a fist. He brought his arm back level with his head, fist ready and poised to strike. Alex held her hands over her face to try and protect herself, and squeezed her eyes shut to brace for the pain.

But it never came.

Alex slowly opened her eyes, and saw David seemingly frozen in place. His expression changed from anger and fury, to confusion and bewilderment. Alex kept her hands up, feeling...something radiating from within her.

 _Am I doing this?_ She wondered as she slowly sat up.

"What is this?" David asked, irritation evident in his voice. Alex pushed her hands forward, and David seemed to float backwards. She moved her hands apart, and David's arms seemed to follow her movements. His arms stuck out at his sides as he stood against the wall in a T-pose. Alex stared at him with a blank expression.

"I've had enough." She replied, pushing David up a little higher on the wall. "Enough pain." To emphasize her point, Alex slowly closed her right hand into a fist, manipulating the energy into David's arms. She could hear the bones snapping, and David let out an agonizing scream.

"Enough words." She said, turning her left hand slowly so that her palm faced her. David let out another blood-curdling scream that stopped rather abruptly. Blood seeped from his mouth and down his shirt.

"Enough of you." Alex dropped her voice and opened her right hand again, turning it in to face her like her left hand. David stared in horror at her. If he could have screamed, he would have. In one swift motion Alexandra turned her hands back to face David, then pulled her left hand back. David's body severed at the waist, and his lower half pulled away from his body before falling to the floor in an unceremonious heap.

Blood poured from his still levitating torso, intestines dangling grotesquely like string. Alex dropped her hands to her sides and David's upper body fell to the floor with a thud. She collapsed to her knees as well, breathing heavily. Everything around her faded away, and she recognized that she was back in the bunker of the tower.

"Alexandra..." A voice spoke softly from beside her. Alex snapped her head towards the voice and held her hands up, radiating the same energy, and pushed back whoever was there. As soon as she did, she realized who it was.

"Oh, god!" She put her hands down and jumped to her feet. She rushed over and fell to her knees again. "I'm sorry, Bucky!" Alex wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him. "I'm sorry." She repeated. She felt him hug her gently.

"Don't apologize. It's OK." He stroked the back of her head to comfort her. Over his shoulder, she saw Bruce and Tony coming out from the wall-door. Alex immediately let go of Bucky and went to cover herself. She looked down, but saw that her shirt was completely intact. The look of confusion on her face was evident, until she reminded herself that what she had just experienced wasn't real.

Despite the fact that it seemed to be based on a memory. Just ending in a vastly different way.

"Are you alright?" Bruce asked, standing a few feet away. Alex nodded, but looked down in shame.

"I wish you guys hadn't seen that." She admitted. Nobody spoke, but Bucky held her hand in his. "When you said 'simulation', I thought you meant that _you_ guys were going to create a situation for me. Not pull something out of my memories..." Her voice trailed off.

"That was a memory?" Clint asked in surprise from the doorway. Alex nodded again.

"Yeah. Except this time, it had a very different ending." She corrected. Her gaze wandered and fell on Tony. For the first time since meeting him, he looked...shaken? Maybe that wasn't the right word for it. He looked shocked, and maybe a little worried.

"Well," Natasha began, "at least we know a bit more about your telekinesis." She changed the subject, hoping to divert away from one of the more painful memories Alexandra had.

"Let's take a break." Tony suggested before heading towards the elevator. Alexandra reached over her shoulder and pulled the little device off her neck, then handed it to Bruce. Bucky stood up and held Alex's hand as she followed. Everyone silently trailed out of the bunker and into the elevator.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex discovers new powers.

"How long until it's ready?" Rollins asked. The room was small with a few desks that had computer monitors on them. In the center of the room, there was a large tube filled with some kind of liquid. Floating inside, hooked up to some kind of life support system, was Rumlow.

"A few hours at most." A young man in a lab coat replied. He was holding a clipboard and pen, standing in front of the tube. It looked like he was monitoring the vitals.

"Good." Rollins smiled as he continued to stare at Rumlow.

"If we had access to - " The young man began, only to be abruptly cut off.

"Hey!" Rollins shouted suddenly. "Nobody asked you anything. Nobody told you to speak." His tone was condescending and mocking as he stepped a few feet towards the man in the lab coat. "I know you're new here. But you should know your place, Alfred. OK?"

"Albert." He replied. Rollins took a few more steps closer to him.

"What was that?" He asked.

"My name. It's Albert, not Alfred." He clarified, not sensing the trouble he was getting himself into. Rollins arched his eyebrows.

"I...don't remember asking your name." He said, putting a hand on his shoulder. His grip was strong, bordering on painful. "You know what? I don't care what your name is." He added. Before he could speak again,he grabbed his gun from his holster and fired one round off into Albert's skull. He fell limp onto the floor, blood pouring from his wound.

The other workers in the room looked up from their monitors with startled expressions. Their eyes seemed to shift from Albert's dead body, to the man who had just shot him, and then back to the body again.

"Anyone else?" He asked, holding his hands out as he stared at the terrified workers. Immediately, they scrambled to get back to work. "You!" He pointed to a woman with chestnut shoulder length hair. She jumped in fright. "You monitor the vitals now." He commanded. She nodded silently and rushed over to Albert's body and grabbed the clipboard and pen. Drops of blood stained the white papers, but she did her best to ignore them.

"Someone get the cleaning crew so they can get Alfred out of here!"

* * *

"I wanna go back in again." Alex said suddenly. The group was crowded around the counter in the kitchen in silence. Nobody seemed to want to say anything, so Alex spoke up.

"I don't think that's a good idea. I think you should rest before you go in again." Bucky told her. Alex shook her head.

"Bucky, the longer we wait around without doing these tests, the more time that gives those assholes to bring Rumlow back _and_ make these stupid clones." She countered. Bucky sighed and looked down at the floor.

"Alexa," Steve spoke up, "can we at least talk about what happened down there?" He asked. Alex looked at him and swallowed nervously.

"Wh-what's there to talk about?" She asked defensively. "You guys can put the pieces together yourselves." She said, a bit more harshly than she had meant to. Steve frowned and looked off to the side. "Sorry... I didn't mean to sound so..." Steve looked back to her and she sighed heavily.

"Alright." Alex put her hands on the counter and stared at Steve. "Yes, it was a memory. Only it ended differently than what you all saw. Yes, it happened on more than one occasion. It's not something I like to remember, so if we're done talking about it... I'd like to try and forget it again." She said. "And... yes. Steve, I was talking about you." Alex whispered.

She could hear snippets of thoughts from everyone, but she already knew what they were thinking without telepathy, or even empathy. Their expressions and body language told Alex everything she needed to know. Bucky stood next to her, his hands clenched into fists. The metal of his limb seemed to groan under the pressure.

"Bucky..." She grabbed his hand in hers. "Look at me." She said gently. Bucky turned to face her, locking his eyes on hers. "I don't think about those memories anymore. Not since I met you." She smiled at him, her tone soft and gentle. Bucky relaxed his hands and exhaled quietly. Alex saw his shoulders fall.

"Are you sure you can handle going back in so soon?" He asked with worry. Alex nodded.

"Yes." She replied. "I know you don't want me to, but the sooner we figure this out, the more prepared we'll be."

 _I don't want to admit it, but she's right._ Steve thought. Alex looked at him with a knowing expression. Steve pursed his lips and Alex winced.

"Sorry, Steve... I didn't mean to." She apologized. "Bruce," She turned her attention to the scientist, "why am I not having any trouble with my empathy?" She asked.

"Well, if I had to hazard a guess, I'd say it's because that was a power you had before the serum. You already learned how to handle it. Everything else is new." He replied. "In time, and with practice, I believe you'll be able to handle your other abilities." Alex nodded, but sighed again.

"I..." Alex started, but didn't know how to say what she wanted without sounding rude. "Bruce, can I talk to you for a minute?" She asked, letting go of Bucky's hand.

"Me?" Bruce asked in surprise. Alex nodded. "Of course." He walked over to her, and Alex lead him into the nearby lounge area. "What is it?" He asked, once they were out of earshot of the others.

"I don't want everyone knowing so many dark things about me." She started. "The first time was bad enough..."

"So, what would you like me to do?" He asked. Alex took a breath.

"Can...Can it just be you, Steve, and Bucky this time?" She asked him. "You can tell everyone else about the results, but..." Alex rubbed the side of her head. Bruce seemed to be staring at her, as if contemplating the outcome of saying yes or no.

"Alright." He agreed with a nod. "I'll let them know." Alex felt her shoulders relax, and that was when she realized how tense she had been. She hugged Bruce and smiled.

"Thank you. Thank you so much." It might have seemed silly, but Alex actually felt less nervous about going back through a simulation now that there would be less people watching. She released Bruce after a moment. "Sorry about that." She laughed with embarrassment.

"Don't worry about it." He replied with a kind smile. "Let's head back." Alex nodded and let Bruce lead the way to the kitchen. She stood next to Bucky again.

"So, Alex has asked that for the next time that it just be Sergeant Barnes, Steve, and myself." He said.

"It's nothing personal, you guys." Alex quickly added. "I just...Well, the less people that see...that stuff, the more comfortable I'll feel." She explained. "And it's already hard enough letting these guys see it." She couldn't meet their eyes as she spoke.

"You guys will still know what happens." Bruce continued. "Well, the outcome I mean." He corrected. Alex stared at the marble counter top, focusing on the swirling patterns that spread across it. She couldn't bring herself to look at anyone for the moment.

 _Can't say I blame her._ She heard Clint think. That brought her eyes up to meet his. She smiled weakly and he nodded in return.

"That's fine with me." Tony spoke up for the first time since leaving the bunker. "I should go...check in with Pepper, anyway." He motioned over his shoulder, then turned and left.

"Clint and I can find something to do, I'm sure." Natasha said playfully. Clint scoffed and shook his head, but smiled anyway. They stood up from their chairs and headed to the elevator.

"That went better than I thought it would." Alex admitted, running her hands through her hair.

"Are you sure you want to go back in so quickly?" Bucky asked. She could feel his apprehension and nervousness. Alex looked at him.

"Yeah." She replied, taking his hand. "You're killing me here, Bucky. Your nervousness and worry feel like bricks on my shoulders." She said. "I know you're worried, but I'll be fine. I...I know I will." Alex wasn't sure who she was trying to convince.

"The first time is always a little jarring." Bruce said. "But now you know what to expect, so it should be a little less nerve-wracking." The scientist did his best to try and reassure the young girl. Alex nodded.

"I trust you, Bruce." She replied, turning to face him. "I want to do this." Bruce nodded.

"I'll head down to the bunker and get things set up again." He said. Alex nodded, and the trio watched him leave on the elevator.

"Alexa..." Steve spoke up after having been quiet for some time. Alex looked at him. "I'm sorry." Was all he said. She looked at him with confusion. "I'm sorry you had to go through that. Had I known, I..." He exhaled heavily.

"Oh, Steve." She said softly. "Don't do that to yourself. It was hell, yeah. But I wouldn't change it. Because it brought me to you guys." Alex explained. "I feel like...I belong here. For the first time in a really long time, I feel like I'm needed somewhere." She paused. "No, I'm _wanted_ somewhere." Alex corrected herself. "Wanted by people who care about me." She looked from Steve to Bucky with a smile.

"You're a handful, but we love you." Bucky joked to try and lighten the mood. Alex stuck her tongue out at him and elbowed him in the side before bringing her attention back to Steve.

"Stop beating yourself up about the past, Steve." Alex told him softly. "Otherwise, I'll beat you up myself." She said, half joking and half serious. Her statement earned a weak smile from Steve.

"Point taken." He chuckled. Alex took Bucky's hand, and the three headed into the elevator.  


* * *

Down in the bunker, Bruce gave Alex the little bit of plastic that she now referred to as 'Tony's Torture Tech'. She affixed it to her neck in the same place as last time, then braced herself as the jolt of electricity rocked her body.

"Son of a bitch!" Alex rubbed her temples and took a deep breath. "Hopefully I won't have to put up with that for much longer." She said.

"Remember, if things get too stressful we'll pull you out." Bruce reminded her. Alex looked at him and nodded.

 _Hopefully this won't be as bad as the last one._ She thought. Bucky gave her a kissed on the head before the three men headed off to the room behind the wall.

"OK, Alex. Just like last time." Bruce's voice came over the speaker again. "We'll start in ten." Alex nodded and flashed a thumbs up sign. "Ten...nine...eight...seven..." Alex closed her eyes and took a breath. "Six...five...four..." A familiar wave of anxiety washed over her again, and she knew they could probably see how fast her heart was beating. "Three...two...one." Alex groaned and opened her eyes.

"Hey beautiful." A voice said from somewhere behind her. Alex turned her head, but was stopped by her arm. She looked up and saw her wrists bound over her head, suspended from something attached to the ceiling. She jerked against her bindings, but they refused to give.

"What the hell is this?" She asked angrily. "Where am I?" She was able to see out of the corner of her eye as the figure behind her came into view. Her stomach dropped. "Am I ever going to be rid of you?" She asked with irritation.

"Never, sweetheart." Rumlow replied with a laugh.

"Where's Bucky? I know you have him." Alex demanded. "If you hurt him, I'll kill you. And make sure it sticks this time." She practically growled, despite her vulnerable state.

"Aww. You're so cute when you're trying to act like a superhero." He chastised her, staring at her in a way that made her stomach twist into knots. Alex roughly jerked against her restrains again, but they didn't break.

"Fuck you, Rumlow." Alex hissed angrily. Her heart was beating faster, and she felt herself getting angrier and angrier.

"There'll be time for that later." He replied, taking a step closer to her. Alex narrowed her gaze at him.

"Don't you fucking touch me." She hissed. A sudden loud bang startled Alex, and she turned her attention towards the sound. Rumlow brought his gaze towards the door with a knowing smirk. Alex's heart seemed to jump into her throat. "Bucky!"

He looked like he had been on the bad end of a twenty person brawl; something Alex never thought possible. His lower lip was busted open and bleeding, cuts were all over his face, his right arm was clearly broken, and his metal arm looked like it had been disabled somehow. There was a man behind him who kicked him forward. Bucky fell to his knees and grimaced in obvious pain.

"Don't touch him!" Alex exclaimed, glaring at the man who had kicked Bucky. "Get away from him!" The man stepped into the room, and Alex was able to clearly see his face. "You..." She said in a low voice. "I'll kill you, too." She threatened. Rumlow laughed again.

"It's she cute?" He asked. The other man smirked.

"Adorable." Rollins replied in a mocking tone.

"Fuck you both." Alex spat angrily. Rollins took a step towards her, but stopped suddenly. Alex saw Bucky behind him, holding on to his ankle with his right hand. She could only imagine how painful that must have been for him. Rollins turned and pistol whipped him hard against his cheek. Bucky fell to the floor, a fresh wound on his cheek oozed blood down his face. He gritted his teeth in obvious pain.

Alex felt her anger come to a boiling point. She roughly jerked against her bindings again. Surprisingly, they broke free and Alex fell to the floor. It took everyone in the room a moment to register what happened. As soon as she did, she jumped to her feet and was met with a punch to the jaw. Her head jerked sideways and the pain shot through her jawline, but she ignored it.

She turned back to face Rumlow and immediately held her hands up to block the punch he had thrown. His fist collided with her arm and she took a step backwards to get some distance between them. Rumlow quickly closed the gap, attempting to land a fury of blows. Alex did her best to block what hits she could, but a few landed on her ribs and sent waves of pain across her abdomen.

Somehow, Alex was able to side-step away from one of Rumlow's punches. The sudden miss seemed to make him lose his balance. Alex took the opportunity to land a swift kick in his stomach, which knocked the wind out of him. He coughed and wheezed, and Alex punched him in the jaw. Rumlow let out a pained grunt. Alex kicked him again, but he was able to grab hold of her ankle. He shoved her away, and Alex almost fell over.

She turned back to face him again, and saw that he had pulled a knife out. Alex was just barely able to register his slash and held her arm up to protect herself. The feeling of his blade slicing through her skin caused her to cry out and hold her hand over her wound. Rumlow flipped the blade in his hand, and brought it down in a stabbing motion. Alex quickly held her arms up and managed to catch his wrist as the knife stopped but an inch away from her face.

Rumlow pushed hard with both hands, trying to force the knife closer. Alex pushed hard against him, but found herself moving backwards until she hit the wall. She grunted as she continued to keep the knife blade from piercing her skin. Rumlow put his other hand on the end of the handle and used it as more leverage to try and push the knife closer. Alex let out a groan as she struggled with him. Despite her enhanced strength, she still found herself fighting to gain the upper hand against Rumlow.

"All that _power_ , and you still can't take me on." He mocked her. Alex pushed against his wrist, moving the blade away ever so slightly. Somehow, they were evenly matched. Suddenly, Rumlow took his hand off the end of the handle and wrapped it around Alex's neck. Her eyes went wide with surprise and Rumlow began to squeeze her neck. Alex instinctively moved one of her hands and gripped his wrist. Now, she had to split her attention and strength between preventing herself from being stabbed _and_ strangled. She held his wrists tightly in her grip, nearly able to pull his one hand away from her neck.

"Let...go...!" Alex wheezed out. Rumlow suddenly let go and took a step back. Alex let go of his wrists and brought her hands up to her throat as she gasped in air. He looked at her with confusion evident on his face.

"What the hell are you doing, Rumlow?" Rollins exclaimed. Rumlow looked at him, still confused. Alex glanced at him briefly before looking back at Rumlow. He snapped his attention back to her and quickly tried to stab her again. Alex was able to catch his arm in her grasp.

"Drop the knife!" She exclaimed. Rumlow opened his hand and the knife fell from his grasp and clattered on the concrete. Alex's eyes grew wide.

"Bitch!" Rollins hissed. Alex turned her head to see him raised his gun on her. Her heart began beating faster. She pulled Rumlow close to her, and pushed him in front of her as the gun went off. He staggered back a few steps, clutching his chest. Blood soaked through his shirt, and he fell to his knees. Without a sound, he collapsed on the floor. Alex stared at Rollins, her hands shaking.

"Drop the gun." She commanded. To her surprise, Rollins didn't do as she said. He smirked and put his finger on the trigger. Alex swallowed nervously, feeling her panic rise.

"Oh, princess..." He taunted her. He pointed the gun at Bucky, and Alex took a step forward. Rollins snapped his arm back up and pointed the gun at her. " _Don't_ come any closer." He warned her. "Or I'll put a bullet in his skull."

"Don't! Please!" She reflexively cried out. The thought of losing Bucky felt like her heart was going to be ripped out of her chest. Alex held her hands out and tried to focus her energy into using her telekinesis. But she couldn't concentrate enough to channel it.

"Stop what you're trying to do, Alex." Rollins told her. He bent down and pulled Bucky up into a kneeling position. He let out a pained cry that nearly sent Alex bursting into tears. "I know all about your telekinesis." He said, pressing the barrel of the gun against Bucky's head. She stared at him, on the verge of tears.

"Please... He's...all I have." Alex pleaded. Rollins looked at her and chuckled.

"Look at you. All those powers, and you're still pathetic." He sneered. Alex shook her head.

"I'm...I'm not." She replied in an unconvincing tone.

"Don't worry, though. Once we bring you back with us, we'll teach you how to not be so pathetic." He informed her. Alex brought her gaze up and stared at him in horror.

"I'm not going anywhere with you!" She exclaimed.

"You don't have a choice in the matter, Alex." Rollins said. "We made you into what you are. You're _ours_ now." His words sent chills down Alex's spine.

"I'm _not_ yours!" She cried out. "Or his!" She pointed at Rumlow's body. "I'd rather die than go anywhere with you."

"It's because of him, isn't it?" Rollins pushed the gun against Bucky's head, making the poor battered man tilt his head to the side. Alex felt her stomach drop, sensing something bad was about to happen. Rollins heaved him up again, making him stand on his feet.

"Wait! Please!" Alex exclaimed, despite nothing happening. "I'll go with you. Just don't hurt him!" She said.

"Do you think I'm stupid?" Rollins asked with irritation. Alex felt her jaw drop slightly. "You can't bat your eyelashes at me and feign innocence. I know you're not gonna go anywhere while he's still in the picture."

"No! Don't!" Alex yelped. Rollins cocked the gun, and Alex felt panic like she had never felt before. **_"STOP!"_** Alex screamed out.

Rollins and Bucky flew back until they were stopped by the far wall. Alex's eyes grew wide and she trembled where she stood. It took a few moments for her to process what had happened. The two men were crumpled heaps on the floor. Rollins groaned and slowly raised his gun. In a panic, Alex held her hands up in front of herself and the gun flew towards her.

"...Bitch..." Rollins snapped weakly as he struggled to stand. Alex grabbed hold of the gun and aimed it at him. She squeezed the trigger and watched as holes appeared on Rollins' chest and blood poured out of them. Alex squeezed the trigger until the gun clicked, signaling that the barrel was empty. It took her a moment to register that the gun was empty. Once she did, she let the weapon fall from her hands as she stared at Rollins' body. A pained groan brought her attention to Bucky.

"Bucky!" She cried out and rushed over to him.

"Why hasn't the simulation ended?" Steve asked Bruce. "I thought it was supposed to end once the threat was neutralized."

"That's one of the ways." Bruce replied. "The simulation knows when to stop. Apparently, there's still something left for her in this one."

"Bucky! Bucky... I'm so sorry." Alex said as she knelt down next to him. She hovered her hands over him, unsure where to grab him to help him up. Every place on his body looked like it hurt, and she didn't want to put him in any more pain. After a moment, she snaked one arm under Bucky's neck and gently sat him up while she cradled his upper body. She saw some sort of little device attached to Bucky's bionic arm, and she ripped it off angrily.

"I'm sorry..." She repeated softly, gently wiping away the blood from his cheek. Her own wounds didn't even register in her mind anymore. Her own well being wasn't even a thought. She couldn't care less about herself. She knew his wounds weren't necessarily life threatening, but he was hurt because they wanted her. Alex didn't think she could forgive herself. Bucky's cold fingers brushed against her arm.

"It's not your fault." He replied. Alex looked down at him. She wanted to take his pain away. Her free hand made its way to his face and she gently caressed his cheek. As she stared at him, trying to find the words to say, her hand began emitting a strange faint blue light. Alex felt her energy suddenly dip, causing her to feel tired. Bucky groaned loudly and gritted his teeth as there was an audible _SNAP_ as the bone in his right arm popped back into place.

Alex looked at him through half-lidden eyes. She watched as the cut on his cheek slowly sealed up and disappeared, leaving behind just the blood that had spilled from it. She let out a weak groan as she suddenly felt weak and drained. She fell against Bucky with closed eyes, and she felt him embrace her for a few seconds before she felt the coolness of the floor against her cheek.

"Alexa?" A voice drifted through the air. She felt two hands gently roll her onto her back before lifting her up off the ground. She didn't even need to open her eyes to know who it was.

"Will she be alright?" Bucky asked Bruce as they headed towards the elevator. Bruce nodded and pulled the little device off the back of her neck.

"She's used up a lot of energy today. She's just worn out, now." He reassured Bucky. "After she wakes up, we'll talk to everyone about what happened." He said. The elevator doors closed and the car started moving upwards.

"We're really in for a rough time..."


End file.
